My 18yr old daughter is way out of control

[jojo7401]

My 18 yr old daughter is driving me crazy with stress and worry. Shes thrown everything possible at me in a few short years. Shes done and is still currently doing the drugs (meow,coke,speed). She drinks all the time. Shes recently walked out on her job to go on a month long "bender". I have phone calls all hours of the night off her saying shes stuck miles away with no money,so I have to sort out pick ups. Last night (5.30am) was the most recent. She was in hospital having broken her knuckles fighting! The police have brought her home on several occassions in a drunken state. Ive tried everything possible to help her. Councelling,doctors,Ive had her arrested,tough love,support etc but nothing seems to get through to her! My whole life is controlled by her actions. She`s making me ill but I simply dont know what to do with her anymore.

AnyFucker - so did I. Poor chap.

OP - is there any way she'd agree to official rehab? I don't know how hard it is to get in though.

Oh my goodness, poor girl
Such a rejection! Imagine not being worth wanting to stay alive for, and that could well be her perspective at such a tender age And now possibly with all the issues that come with having a severely disabled parent. She's escaping all her thoughts and stresses, I think, turning them off with drugs and drink. Does she talk about how she feels about what her dad did? Because, sympathetic as much as I am to his plight, he has put her in such an awful situation, and no doubt he can't explain his reasons to her, and can't explain that she couldn't save him from himself etc, and that most importantly, it's not her fault x

Shes always had a very volatile relationship with her father. She was closer to his mother,who died 3 years ago,which is possibly another trigger. Her father done the suicide attempt through drugs,which is why I cant get my head around her taking the filthy stuff herself? Shes seen the damage it does to people,yet shes hell bent of self destruction. Ive sat up night after night listening to her,wiping her tears and trying to help her understand.I took her to councilling yet she went to one appointment then told me its a load of crap and has refused to go since. I know she needs rehab but how can I make her go? Shes refusing everything offered to her. I had to come home from my holiday a week early today because Ive had several phone calls off my neighbours. She had a party here last night which went on ALL night. My house has been completely smashed up,Ive found joints in every single room (my youngest sons bedroom included,who is a very sick boy),all my sharp kitchen knives stuffed down the sides of my settee?? All Ive had off her is "im in my mates house. Ill txt you when I wake later". Ive finally told her I dont want her home. Ive packed her things and am dropping them off down her "mates" house! It terrifies me that by kicking her out,shell destroy herself,but shes doing that anyway,but destroying the rest of us in the process. Until she starts respecting herself and others now,theres nothing more I can do x

Sooo difficult. You have got to protect the rest of your family and yourself of course. Leave the door open though, yeah ?

Another idea that could work, if you have the money or can find it, how about booking a holiday somewhere just the two of you? Somewhere with no bars or nightlife that was very quiet but relaxing. Could you encourage her to leave her phone in the safe for at least half a day so you can talk....
I was a wild child teen, looking back it was a desperate plea for help. I am not saying this is the same for your dd, but it is possibly...and I wish my mother had helped me in this way.
Give her time there to evaluate her life, talk about what she would like to do with her life, she will stop the drugs whilst you are there at least which will be good, talking, discussing the future may help...
Otherwise call the local police station, ask them for a cell visit (they will oblige) and take her in, show her the outcome of her actions. Lock her in for ten minutes. Taker her along to the magistrates court for half a day, and see what happens eventually. Take her to the homeless centre and meet the drug addicts with no teeth and no life. It is almost certainly a phase as it is with most of us, and she will grow out of it at some point, good luck x

My door will always be left open for her and she knows that,but whilst shes still acting this way,I cant have her here. Its crippling me not knowing where she is right now,but I have to make her see what shes actually has back home and she wont see that until its taken away from her. We have a caravan and Ive asked her to come up there on numerous occassions,just the 2 of us. She agreed to come up once. I was really happy but then she invited 2 of her mates to join us?? so that trip didnt happen! Ive asked her on mother/daughter days out but she can never come alone. She always has to drag her mates with us,so I`ve given up on that now. I had her arrested one night. She had a major kick off (drunk). She was trying to kick me in the head and called me a slag etc,so I rang 999. She was locked up for the night. I hoped that would off been the jolt she needed but no,she came home and bragged about it to her mates! Homeless centre is a good idea though as she might not like seeing where she will end up if she dont change her lifestyle. I really do hope she grows out of it soon,because I hate seeing her like this x

I hope so too. All the best

op i hear you

my son is only 16 but i have had to make him leave last week

long story,just wanted you to know your not alone

best wishes