15 YR OLD DAUGHTER PROBLEMS

[maryni]

Hi My daughter has just turned 15.She never wants to go out and the few friends that she has from school(private) are more than a little odd and some very abusive to her but she takes it! She has bad dyslexia but has little interest in anything and is permanently attached to her computer or phone ( like most teenagers) .When you ask her anything about what she's doing or wants to do its always I don't know'. School don't seem bothered as she doesn't cause any trouble to them unlike some of her friends. We are going to move her school at the end of the year as we think this has something to do with it in part with who she is mixing with but she is home for 9 week soon and apart from our family holiday she has no plans. Sorry sounding off and venting but I'm loosing sleep and so worried about her. Her elder sister is more outgoing and gets frustrated as she won't help in the house and everyone has to work around her younger sister. Help!

Could she be depressed? If she's quite introverted then the last thing she will want to do is socialise much outside of the home.

Try not to compare your daughters (I know it's very hard not to) but maybe instead of trying to get her out of the house - focus on things inside of the home. She should definitely be pulling her weight with chores etc but are they some shared interests that you could do together? Eg cooking?

How is she doing academically? Moving her to a new school in her last year of exams could be absolutely disastrous for her.

Does she take care of herself? Her appearance, her diet etc?

Let her have no plans. She's had a stressful time at school, let her slob around at home doing her own thing on her own without any pressure. Being 15 can be horrible if you don't fit in. Just make sure she pulls her weight in the household (but pick your battles carefully).

do you remember being 15?
it is a truly horrible time IMO.

academically she's not doing very well may get 1-2 gcses.and the local authority say that they will let her go back a year to start at the new school. It's brand new and all those starting there will be new at the same time so I thought it would be a good place to start. They teach differently with academic alongside work experience and they have their own personal coach and only 80 pupils in the school in the first year! If this was a new problem I would think she was depressed but this has been going on for 3 + years and no sign of getting any better. I never compare the 2 of them as their totally different hence why they went to different schools so there was no competition.

ps she's eating normally for a 15yr old (raiding the fridge) looks after her appearance and is a perfect weight ( at least I'm glad I don't have worries about an eating disorder!)