smart phone use in 13year olds

[janelewes]

Hi mums,
I feel unsure of how to deal with this issue of the phone, my son has an iphone and is on it an awful lot, with headphones and seems really upset when I try and ask him to leave it at home for a bit, or just to have some screen free time. He is doing well at school and has lots of good friends, yet at home has his phone on him constantly. I do not want to take it away as it seems mean, but do other mums have this issue at all ? I know 13 is a difficult age for kids, would welcome your thoughts,

is it being used to listen to music? To be honest if he being sensible I would leave him to enjoy it.

As he is doing well at school and has plenty of 'real life' socialisation I would be tempted to leave him to it. As long as there is 'phone curfew' for bed time so he isn't on the damn thing until midnight.

first, are you setting the right example?

second, continued headphone use is why many late teens are half-deaf. Make sure the volume is low.

It depends what he is using it for imo

We all tend to keep smartphones with us in our house too and just see it as part of every day life now. If your DS is doing well academically and socially I don't see why it should be a problem. If he is listening to music perhaps you could encourage him to play it through speakers so it becomes more of a communal activity? I think at that age I was glued to my walkman so I don't think it's a new technology thing (and my hearing is perfect despite all those years of headphone use!)

depends how loud you had it. If you were sensible, fine. All those whose 'music' can be heard outside their earphones are on a hiding to deafness.

I have a small basic mobile (can't be bothered with a brickphone - who needs all that charging, size, weight, expense) and quite often forget to pick it up.

btw this is a laptop, much more versatile!

thanks so much for your thoughts guys, it is really helpful just to be able to share and hear what other parents think, especially as finding it hard parenting teens, Have a lovely day all of you who have taken the time to respond xxx

Ds is 12 and would spend his life with his phone. He too is doing well at school and does lots of sport etc.

I know his phone is important to him but I do have times and places where he cannot have it. No phones at the table or anywhere we are doing a family activity. No phone in bed.