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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

Porn In Private Schools

11 replies

N4NCYDR3W65 · 18/05/2015 14:31

My 13 year old DS is attending a highly sought after private boys school. He has been made to watch violent porn on the bus and has now become very withdrawn, anxious and depressed. Some but not all of his grades have dropped. What do I do now?

OP posts:
trice · 18/05/2015 14:33

I don't think the school has anything to do with it, it happens everywhere I'm afraid. Have you talked to him about it? Is he being bullied?

Twirlwirlywoo · 18/05/2015 14:36

Porn of all degrees is out there and being circulated on many school buses and probably in and around many schools both private and maintained.

You need to talk with your son,perhaps arrange some counselling for him as well.

You also need to approach the school and discuss your sons issues with them.

HirplesWithHaggis · 18/05/2015 14:36

Report to the police and find alternative transport.

Yuleloglatte · 18/05/2015 14:39

Showing porn to an underage child is illegal. The school should take it very seriously. Whether the school is private or state should make no difference, it's a safeguarding issue.

AuntieStella · 18/05/2015 14:43

Is it a bus service provided by the school?

They need to know what is happening on it. And the pastoral team need to know about his current level of upset.

MNHQ
BeccaMumsnet · 18/05/2015 14:58

Hi everyone - we're just going to move this over to a more appropriate topic.

Original poster
N4ncyDr3w65 · 19/05/2015 14:06

It's been taking place on the school bus and he's not the only one viewing. I have told the school everything. I just feel I can't let him out of my sight. I don't want him to go to other friend's homes in case they can get access there. I've got zero tolerance policy on internet usage - it has to be supervised even if it's for homework (all parental locks are on). This is so heart-breaking.

OP posts:
titchy · 19/05/2015 14:18

Agree the school should come down on this like a ton of bricks. Can they put a supervisor on the bus for a while? What is happening to the bullies (this is what this is)?

However.... Please don't stop him going to friends' houses just in case they don't have parental controls on their internet. The last he needs is to be isolated from his peers. And while I can see that this is upsetting for both of you, I think you need to accept that teenage boys will look at porn, and whilst it's unpleasant I don't think most kids would be so shocked they needed counselling - is there anything else going on! Clearly being forced to, and the violent nature of the material is horrid, but what would happen if he just refused to watch it? Can he say no? Can you or the school do some role play with him? Can the school get the police in to do an assembly on how distributing and forcing someone to watch porn is illegal?

titchy · 19/05/2015 14:18

Oh and it definitely isn't just a private school thing!

chumaniward1 · 19/05/2015 20:00

are you sure a zero tolerance policy on the internet is a good thing? whilst his friends are social networking he's just going to become increasing secluded

tropicalfish · 19/05/2015 22:04

maybe he feels guilty and upset that his values are being eroded by situations hes not in control of. It must be worse in an all boys school.

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