Depressed 14 year old daughter

[mels66]

Hi this is my first posting on here but I have been reading other posts for a while as it helps to know some of you are having similar issues. Thanks for that.
My daughter is now 14, she is bright, articulate(I can be out talked in any argument lol) however in recent months it has come to light that she has been self harming. I removed her scissors etc but she then took the next step of an overdose. She is clinically depressed but continues to function well at school( grades are still up there) She has been seen by CAMHS, and they want to try CBT again. She had a counsellor for bullying when she was 10 and then had CBT again at 12 for what they thought was IBS. She is now saying she doesnt want to do CBT, it doesnt work and theres no point in working at school as she wont achieve and she might as well be dead. This was not the ranting of a stroppy teenager but said in dead pan voice like she has just given up. I am scared I am going to lose her. All of the services are trying to help but what if she wont let them?
Sorry this has gone on a bit :(

Hey Mels66,

She sounds like a great girl and it sounds like she knows what isn't working for her, wonder if she has an idea of what might work? If not theres organisations like childline that have loads of info and support on their website.

Don't lose hope, there's always different ways of doing things and if she us up for talking more but she knows cbt isn't working for her there's a type called person centred counselling which is quite different to cbt. Think camhs might need to know tho if she does want to try a different approach to what they offer. Hope I've helped a bit!

You sound like a great mum btw, not easy to really listen when a kid is so unhappy.

Sorry to hear your problems mels66. We have gone through very similar and it's a long haul. My dd (now 17) was diagnosed as clinically depressed and wouldn't (couldn't) engage with counselling/therapy and eventually the camhs psychiatrist put her on the lowest dose of sertraline (fluoxetine, the first choice med for teens, made her faint). The sertraline seems to have worked wonders and, although dd still has her moments, in general she feels that life is worth living again. She occasionally still self harms, but now once every few months as opposed to every week. There were definitely times when I thought we would never see light at the end of the tunnel.

I'm not saying that medication is the answer to everything, but for us when all other avenues had been explored it was a godsend.

She was also recommended a book by the psychiatrist 'mind over mood' but dd wasn't impressed!

Good luck with everything. Make sure you look after yourself - it is such a heart breaking and emotional time trying to stay strong for dd.

Hi Mels66 I am so sorry to hear what you and your DD are going through. She is obviously not thinking clearly is she when she doesn't think she can achieve at school?

Does she have any friends at school or home, anyone to confide in? If you think it all stems from the bullying age 10 then perhaps she needs a better counsellor or perhaps there is a support group for bullied children?

Bit random, but does she have a pet to look after, I wonder if this would help. I hope you get the help you need OP, thinking of you and DD

I found www.youngminds.org.uk/ very useful

CBT is a directive form of therapy and doesn't always suit individuals. Have you or CAMHS considered a non-directive approach such as person -centred therapy?