'Going out'?

[Fuschiapink123]

Is officially 'going out' that important in teen circles?
I realise that this is really up to dd 16 but would like to hear mn opinions on this
Dd and 17 yo boy: he has stayed at our house one weekend night for 6 months and more in the school holidays. Also sees her a week night in term time. Bought her Xmas and birthday presents

1. they are not officially going out
2. he says he is not her boyfriend 3)his parents think he is going to a friends house Is this very disrespectful, just immaturity or ok in your opinions? He is fine with me, pleasant etc Says he is not interested in other girls and seems not to be She is upset about it tho but doesn't want to push him away by being needy/ clingy

Are they sleeping together when he stays over. I wouldn't like the fact he is lying to his parents

Yes I don't like the lying is one issue :/

If she is upset by it, then it matters enough for her to talk to him about it without feeling needy or clingy. If he cares about her her feelings, then at least his heart is in the right place as far as your daughter is concerned..if he doesn't then perhaps he prefers things to be commitment free and casual and maybe your daughter needs to decide which way the whole relationship should go.Lying to his parents isn't great, but it could be that they are strict or maybe he doesn't get on....or maybe a million other reasons. Do you know them? He sounds nice enough on the surface...there's worse out there!

Frog21 No I don't know the parents at all
I think that too - she accepts him as he is or moves on but should let him know her feelings about situation. I really don't want any drama over next few weeks as gcses soon so hope she can mentally shelve it
Yes I think he is ok too

I don't think the fact that you don't know his parents is an issue, this is most often the case when DC get older. I would be uncomfortable with the fact that his parents don't know where he is. Not sure I would agree to a sleepover under those circumstances.

Both of my DSs have close friends who are girls, in fact DS1's best friend is a girl. No question of anything more than friendship though and they are both clear on that.

My feeling is that you should encourage her to talk to him about it but really you have to leave her to sort this out herself. You must know the boy quite well by now, can you ask him why he doesn't tell his parents where he is?

I shall either ask him or get her to raise the fact that I am uncomfortable about it. I don't think he talks to his parents much tbh