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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

I'm going to explode and f...ng kill him

10 replies

jollymum · 06/10/2006 20:13

Right, been through this with 16yr old. 13 yr old doing it now. "If you don't answer me then I'm right, yes I am aren't I, you know I'm right because you're not talking to me"
Got himself grounded because of swearing at me yesterday (off sick off school?!).
Wants to go to Youth Club to see someone. Can't accept that he could phone, text etc. Said to him that on no account was he going, said no yesterday and meant it (go custy, go custy..!).
Until hell freezes over , said I. He does a f..ng pic on the comp of that same thing. Told him I'd been through that with oldest one and he'd bullied me into tears and serious stress and that this one won't win. Said if it's good enough for DS1 it's good enough for him.

He won't f...ng shut up, keeps on and on and in a minute I'll lamp him one. He's keeping the 7 yr old awake and keeps making smart arse remarks.

God, I can't go through this sarcasm, abuse and general shit again, I just can't. He knows I'll stick to my guns because last time he shut his door on me and swore at me, I ran at it and took it off the hinges. I'm tired, it's Friday and the nagging has been on since 4pm. I strated to well up and the little shit tells me it's no use crying, no-one cares, seen it all before and I'm being emotionally immature.!
He's supposed to be goung to Drayton Manot tomoprrow with YC and his sister (£44) for two of them and he's on thin ice. Told me I'd run out of people to tell if I carried on, because I was going to phone YC leader up and tell them. It's church involved as well so he should know better.
Just come in and slammed door in my face. Just want a quiet life, stressed out with work and kids at the mo.
Oh well, bed time soon. Just have to wait until he's asleep now (bang goes my early night) in case he sneaks out. DH out too.Voice is cracking from all this talking. Why the FUCK can't no just mean FUCKING NOOOO!!!!!!!!

OP posts:
bubbles4 · 06/10/2006 20:31

ive got one of them, its like they are from another planet.no advice as whatever you say theyve got a reply just muddle from one situation to another as best as i can

winnie · 06/10/2006 20:36

jollymum, sympathies
Stick to your guns, if you feel like crying, do it out of his sight. Don't let him think there is even a possibility that he can win. Can you go and have a bath and lock the door? Just ignore him (I know it's easier said than done). Thinking of you, take care, hope he shuts up soon ;)

jollymum · 06/10/2006 20:41

It's the following me round that does it, goung on and on. Thought they'd grown out of that from being toddlers. If I locked mysled in the bathroom or my room, he'd just tap and tap incessantly until I freaked and then I would exlode.

OP posts:
jollymum · 06/10/2006 20:43

Sorry, spelling or what?! Tired eyes and sad fingers typing away here.Oh and a few glasses of wine and a very sore fingernail from being grated when I was doing cheese slices and ignoring him

OP posts:
PretendFriend · 06/10/2006 20:44

I know it's much easier said than done, esp from a cool unemotional distance over here, but when they are being clever-dick-smart-arses the best way to go on is to act as if they are silent and invisible.

Look through him, don't react, don't respond, don't get upset, don't cry in front of him, whatever he says to try and wind you up, however much he keeps on and on and on, and however you need to (and I know you will) - nothing enrages them more than being ignored and then he will lose it and look stupid and feel stupid and just maybe he will back off.

And you will look calm and in control and will not lose your voice . As I said I know it's hard, I've been there and often crack and shriek, but when I manage not to it does shut them up eventually.

Good luck.

PretendFriend · 06/10/2006 20:45

Sorry, just seen that you are doing that already. Have you got any earplugs?

PretendFriend · 06/10/2006 20:46

And, like with whingeing toddlers, it takes a lot less time for them to give up and shut up the next time

sallyscarystrawberry · 06/10/2006 20:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

jollymum · 06/10/2006 20:52

He's upstairs now and I'm down here! He's not a typical teen in that he's weird anyway. Doesn't use his phone, has few friends and is a bit geeky. Was suspected AS from younger but school gave up on him and he was assessed as "right but odd" His dad, although he won't admit it is also possible AS. Clever geeks with that kind of attitude. Trouble is, I say I won't argue and he just keep saying "Why can't I go" over and over again.Ver clever, grown his hair and got radical. Is going to organise a petition at school about long hair for boys being cut. Was looking up human rights stuff and can't see that two inches off his hair won't get him excluded and gives him a chance at a job and a mortgage. Tried to explain to him but he thinks we're dinasors.

OP posts:
bubbles4 · 06/10/2006 20:57

enjoy the peace long may it last. the wine sounds like a good idea.i,ve tried telling mine that i was their age once and know all the tricks etc bit they look at me as if i.m stupid and ask me what was it like in my day makes me feel ancient

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