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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Birthday present for DS's girlfriend

11 replies

PingPongBat · 27/10/2014 16:05

New territory here so not sure what the norm is. DS (15) has a girlfriend & wants to buy her a present. He's got loads of money saved so had offered to pay for it himself. But I usually give him a tenner to put in a card for his mates' birthdays so I was going to give him the same to buy her a present.

How do other people deal with this? Do your teens buy boy/girlfriend presents themselves or do you pay for them?

OP posts:
chocoluvva · 27/10/2014 19:23

Well, I think it would seem more special if your DS has bought it himself.

rach2713 · 27/10/2014 23:14

If I was you I would give him a few gift ideas that you think she may like and let him pick which one he thinks she will like it will be more special her getting it knowing it's from him and he went out his way getting it instead of you getting it and him just signing the card.

LeftHandedMouse · 28/10/2014 09:54

How long have they been going out? A tenner seems a bit tight for someone 'special'.

Having said that if you have a Tiger shop in town, he can get something teenie for not many pennies.

Or somewhere like totally-funky.co.uk (other online stores are available).

And Next have some reasonably priced sparkly things if he wants to go down that route.

My dsd was given 'a lot' of money to buy her brother and her boyfriend birthday presenets. She spent 85 on a pair of trainers for the b/f because 'he liked them'.

In my mind that's not a gif your g/f or b/f buys you. That's what you have a job or parents for....

Heels99 · 28/10/2014 09:58

He is growing up, let him buy and pay for the present.

Original poster
PingPongBat · 28/10/2014 10:21

Thanks for your thoughts & ideas.

They've only been going out a few months, maybe 4 or 5? not sure (he's very vague, & quite reluctant to talk about his relationships. Nothing sinister about it, he's just a bit shy and unsure of himself so doesn't like talking about girls generally).

No Tiger shop near us, sadly. I've bookmarked the totally-funky site - looks like a good place for inspiration for my DD Smile

His girlfriend's b'day is on Saturday so he's left it rather last minute (I only found out the date yesterday). He's got an idea about a present but I've no idea how much it is (again he's very vague about it!) so I'll probably leave it to him unless he comes and asks for help. He's quite nervous about 'doing the right thing' & pleasing people & I don't want to put him under any pressure to spend a certain amount.

OP posts:
LeftHandedMouse · 28/10/2014 11:52

how serious/'in love' are they? 4 or 5 months si quite a long time at that age.

That pretty much dictates what he ought to buy.

20 might get him a nice little (and I mean little) gift box from Lush, he can order online.

Or Hotel Chocolat - their 15 slabs go down a treat with my girls, not just because they're slabs but because the choc is sooo good and nicely packaged! Online too.

I could go on.........

chocoluvva · 28/10/2014 12:32

This is a terrible confession but it might be relevant to your DS' situation.

When my DD was 14 she had a lovely boyfriend who bought her a very nice pendant for Christmas. It was a lovely piece of jewellery very appropriate for a girl in her early/mid teens IMO. But not DD's usual style. She didn't like it....

Then she googled it Hmm and saw that it must have been bought online as the only stockist in Britain was in London, which is hundreds of miles from us. Therefore her lovely BF must have asked his mum to buy it for him she correctly deduced. Instead of being touched by the fact of him asking his mum for help she was offended/disgusted at the poor chap's 'failure' to get her something himself!

Now I realise this reflects badly on my DD - she was only 14 though! - but perhaps worth bearing in mind. Wink

And a few weeks later they broke up....

Original poster
PingPongBat · 28/10/2014 12:44

Good ideas Left and chocoluvva - thanks!

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Rascalls3 · 28/10/2014 13:17

I would suggest he spends some effort finding a lovely card (or even making one if he is creative !)

My girls have really loved the presents that have involved some time and effort. The photo books can be created quite cheaply and make a lovely memento. Or a favourite photo canvass of the two of them.

One of my daughters who is a keen surfer was given a handmade (and decorated with her name ) balance board ( a board which you place on a ball and then balance on to build core strength ) It must have taken hours to make!

Rascalls3 · 28/10/2014 13:20

Sorry just spotted your post saying the birthday is Saturday so my post will not be much help??

Original poster
PingPongBat · 28/10/2014 18:03

He is creative Rascalls3 and makes cards for relatives (he & DD made 2 cards which slotted together to make a vase of flowers for their granny last year, it was brilliant), but I'm not sure whether it would be 'cool' or not. I'll suggest it though - I'm usually wrong where teenagers are concerned!!

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