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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

STATE SIXTH FORM VERSUS PRIVATE?

5 replies

BabyHare · 02/10/2006 10:52

Hi all

My 15 year old dd is just starting her GCSE year at a private school in Rutland. She has been at private school since she was 3.5 and has always loved it and thrived there.

She has become an EMO teenager and is now all about mooods and depression and kicking against all that is GOOD and FUN... she has just told us that there is no way she is going to continue her education at her school but is going to leave after GCSE's and go to the local comp and do her A leves there. There is nothing we can do to stop her she says etc etc etc.

Should I let her get on with it (save us some money!) or should I fight to make her stay...? She is not very academic so needs to be pushed.... she also does not seem to understand that MSN is not as important as homework and coursework......

Sarah x

OP posts:
EnidMyers · 02/10/2006 10:53

I dont have a teenager yet but my opinion is this

she is not 16, she must do as you say

tell her that you will go and visit the sixth form with her - take it seriously

then take the pc away unless she starts working harder at school

mell2 · 02/10/2006 11:13

Find out as much as possible about the local comp. You may be pleasantly surprised (at least she wants to stay on!)

You have my sympathies about MSN.

Indith · 02/10/2006 14:05

Thought I'd add to this, I was in private from year 3 up but had to go to state 6th form because of financial problems (23 now so not talking too many years ago) and it was fine, those taking a levels are the more academic ones, the chavs, dropouts etc tend to be on the 'easier' courses and have usually dropped out by Christmas.There was a good mix of people, a fair number of whome were also from private schools.

Having been brought up in private she probably has the same mantra as the rest of us private lot, A is what you want, B is OK and C is fail. The personal sense of pride is likely to prevail!

I had some terrible teachers and some fantastic ones, much like at my old private school and I think we benefitted from the increase in freedom and the more equal relationships we had with the teachers. For instance at my old school 'free periods' had to spent studying. When you hit university nobody makes you study so having more control over your time in 6th form is a good middle ground.

I also had more flexibility in a 6th form college to drop subjects and take on extras, there tends to be more scope for doing exactly what you want and not what fits in a smaller schools timetable.

At the end of the day I would say that after 16 her schooling is her choice, if she left school completely there is not much you could do so I would be happy that she wants to stay on, show interest, visit the local comp and other 6th form colleges around to see what she can do at them. You never know, she may change her mind and if not surely the most important part is that she is studying where she wants to be.

Oh and for the MSN? Google 'temptation blocker' and download it, you can then set it to block access to certain programmes (like MSN and the internet as a whole) for a chosen time. Like accidently setting it for 2 hours just when she asks to use the computer for some coursework then...!

BabyHare · 02/10/2006 18:14

Thank you! Thanks Indith, that is VERY helpful. I have sent off for the local comp prospectus and will arrange a visit for us. You are right by the way, I am pleased that she wants to stay on as she could leave and just get a job.... MCDonalds anyone!?

Oh and THANK YOU for the temptation blocker - will do that this evening!!!

Sarah

OP posts:
3littlefrogs · 02/10/2006 23:27

What about sixth form college? My son and my nephew left school (one private, one highly selective state)and went to sixth form college. Ideal for a teenager who wants a bit more freedom and independence.

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