How do i handle a 14 year old female monster?!!

[overthehill20]

My 14 year old daughter is a little bitch.she's constantly lying,speaks to me like dirt and generally behaves in an unacceptable way.Recently we ended up in a tussel and she said i am mental,not good enough for her father and not good enough to be her mother.I'm at the end of my tether.She's determined to be hateful to me to the point of telling major lies about my mental health(of which there is no problem!).It is very serious and i have no idea how to react.Any advice so gratefully received.

She is being a very typical teen. Some do teens better than others yours like mine do it with bells on.
I read a book called - get out my life but first take me and Alex to town.
It explains the development of a teen brain , how it makes them feel and act. It also gives you stratagies to deal with them.
It helped me enormously.
There are loads of books. I got it on amazon. It was simple to read and understanding why made it so much easier to deal with. Which resulted in her calming.
Don't engage in conflict it doesn't resolve it. Please read it or equivent.

Thank you for your reply.I will try to get that book.Why do other people seem so reluctant to speak about these sorts of difficulties.They seem to put on a front that all is well and only occasionally do you hear some brave soul admit the truth of the situation!We should all be supporting each other as i have found it to be a lonely and isolating experience.I also have a younger daughter turning 13 in a few weeks so know i have a very long road ahead!!

Poor you i sympathise . I spent most of my time in a state of high anxiety waiting for the next phone call from school. My DD thankfully does it in phases she is unhelpful all the time but is lovely natured 70% of the time then has the other 30% being quite the opposite . My main issue is school !

My DD17 has had very 'difficult' phases for most of her life: it got worse from 13/14, and now at 17 her entitled attitude and hurtful words are still causing problems in the house. She is quite immature (but can't see it!) and it's so hard not to compare her to DS15, who is, and always has been, a dream - it's just different personalities! I would definitely recommend taking action now. I haven't read that book, although I intend to, but have read many others, The Primal Teen, Blame my Brain, etc; all of which were probably a little heavy, so the 'Alex' one sounds more helpful. I've learnt not to engage, not to shout, and ignore, (it's incredibly difficult, when all you want to do is shout, swear, rant and rage right back at them!!)