Anyone got a spare teenage dd to give an opinion on these school shoes please!

[Debs334]

Dd is starting secondary school in September. She is very small and worried about looking cute/babyish (!). She has small, very wide feet (size 1) and we've struggled to find anything she liked. Her feet are too small for the older range at Clarks and John Lewis only had very babyish shoes in her size. She found these shoes (pic), which were a bit doc marten-esque and she was really pleased with them. However, she showed them to her cousin on FaceTime this morning who said she 'hated' them. Grrrr. So now dd is wobbling about them. I realise this a massively first world problem but I want dd to walk in on her first day (she doesn't know anyone at the school - new to the area) feeling full of confidence. Any opinions welcome, have we got this horribly wrong?!

Oops, I've just realised the ones I linked to are the ones LynetteScavo and Mitzi were talking about. Well, now I know why dd likes them: she is following everyone else. She probably won't be able to have them. She has exceptionally difficult to fit feet - very wide (H fitting) and a very high instep. For the last few years, she has had to have the same design from Start Rite as literally no other style fits properly.

As an aside, at what age do you stop worrying about making your dd wear the shoes that fit her best? When it comes to casual shoes, dd buys whatever she likes - no fitting - and I know probably none of the shoes fit her properly. But with school shoes, I have always insisted on only buying what the fitter recommends. I know I can't keep this up much longer (dd is 14) so, if you have older dds, at what age did you start letting her get what she wants as opposed to what fits?

DD going into Y11 has worn Kickers (ankle boot style) since Y7, though in black Vans since the weather got hot. Depends how hot the school is on the uniform though!

Strangely, both DD (9) and DSD (18) have chosen these Sketchers for school/sixth form

Apparently they are 'cool, comfy and last forever'

I just a lot these days

I just showed dd 11 and she said they were ugly, she has ballet flats and all black vans.

Dd who is 11 is starting secondary in a couple of weeks too and she has just said ' they are almost exactly the same as the ones I picked' so they get her approval. Her best friend has the same ones too, brogues with a slight heel.

I agree that they would look better if you swap the clunky laces for something thinner.

But they are essentially cool in DDs opinion.
She isn't a girly girl though.

Could you take her to staples and get her some new bits and bobs stationery wise? That might help her look forward to it a bit more too. Or a new school bag? Dd bought herself one recently and it has made her more excited about going!

See - I was wrong (first reply)

Just asked dd1 who said "They'd be fine"
She did say that shoes aren't really a big 'fashion thing' at school anyway, but she's seen people wearing shoes like that. Doesn't think it would be a problem.

Thanks everyone. I'm reasonably reassured

My 15yr old has those very shoes. They have lasted a year and she's been happy with them. She alternates them with a pair of Velcro strap Mary Janes.

It's a grammar school ( yup I think it is relevant ) and they are reasonably hot on uniform. I was bored at prize giving. Reviewing footwear from dds year 10 and below ( separate event for older ones) -

Almost all recognisably Clark's/ startrite styles. Lots of brogues. Some Mary Janes. Very few ballet pumps ( not really allowed) a few kickers buckle strap. All fairly worn out and in need if a polish! I think this is where all the huge size Clark's kids shoes reside !

Dumbledoresgirl
When do you stop making them have shoes that fit?

Here never lol. I buy dd1 (21) and still a student a decent pair of boots at Xmas ( black dms last year) and a pair of basic leather black shoes eg from Clark's (she needs them for singing). Then I know she'll be appropriately shod! Other crap shoes - flimsy ballet flats/ canvas pumps etc come and go. She buys them! Funnily enough she wears the better ones more now after a period of "well you can get them but I don't suppose I'll wear em much" she is usually in them. She walks loads though and dislikes trainers.

Debs - around they're mostly wearing the ones most people have linked to here (they look like mens jazz shoes to me - ugly things!), but it's true, none of the kids seem that fussed about who is wearing what school shoe wise?!

Best you don't tell your DD that this 45 yo likes the ones she has chosen best :)

I hope she settles in well and finds some new friends quickly :)

They wouldn't be allowed at dds school because ofvthe stitching but she would love them.

She wanted the similar start rite ones but they are too narrow for her feet.

Dd is 12 & going into year 8 (2.5 G). Last year she measured 1G so we feel your pain. She wore plain Start Rite Mary Janes & we gave ordered the same again.

Dd has an incredibly high instep too do shoes have to be deep enough.

Would be interested to know which shoes Dumbledores girl has found fit right.

DD has wide feet and a high instep and for the past few years has had several pairs of the Sketchers EveDallas linked to above - comfortable and hardwearing.

She is just about to move into year 7 and has already said she wants shoes like the Clarks ones everyone else seems to wear these ones but I'm really not sure they'll suit her feet or be comfortable for walking to school every day (the soles look really thin) so I wonder if she'd accept something like the OP posted. Or even Doc Marten shoes - she's been wanting DM boots for ages, but obviously they wouldn't be acceptable for school. I'm not looking forward to this week's school shoe shopping expedition.

Black vans and converse are the school shoes all the teens wear around here. Sorry can't do links.

Those Clarks shoes are quite narrow with no depth expat

Very surprised they are allowed Pilates.

Gosh neither girls/boys would ever get away with vans/cons at our schools. Has to be " polishable leather" but they don't mind a bit of patent or decent pleather.

exexpat agree those shoes do look pretty thin soled in RL but we've had the same sole ( odd quilted pattern) on some MJs and they lasted pretty well.

I would recommend if your DD has stopped growing getting 2 pairs of shoes and alternating. THe stink goes away!

I think the bag is much more important, tbh.

I like the shoes.

Dd has these.

www.startriteshoes.com/girls-shoes/school-shoes/samba-black-leather-girls-riptape-school-shoes

She reminded me that she tried on the shoes in the ops link & she loved them but they didn't fit properly (we were going to try & black out the stitching)

We were lucky in that dds school is a fairly well known one in specialist circles so i was able to post on a specialist forum & other parents told me what styles their dds wore within the very strict guidelines.

My dd is going into Y7 and has chosen those exact shoes.

She knows what she likes, she does not always want what everyone else wants and does not really care about their opinions.
I think they are cool. I also think they are much better than their flimsy equivalents bearing in mind dd will be walking to school in all weathers and the school don't have lockers to stash willies / boots etc.

Ds is going into Y11. He said the shoes remind him vaguely of the ones the goths and emos wear and no, she won't get teased / bullied for choosing those shoes. (when I asked him about them for dd)

Picturesinthefirelight I think the only shoes my dd can wear are these. Or very similar anyway (dd's shoes from last year are in such a state, it is not easy to match them to the pictures on Start Rite's website and I haven't bought next year's shoes yet).

I know they are Start Rites and this sort of style, but even within this style, some fit dd and some don't. The problem is the width of her foot and her high instep. If the toe bit is too deep, the edge digs into her instep. Too narrow and there is a gap.

I am a little disheartened by Thea's response to my question (though thank you for answering!) I was rather hoping I would be released from the nightmare of trying to find shoes that fit.

Picturesinthefirelight I have just read to the end of the thread (I stopped at your post asking me which shoes fit my dd). I can see by your link that you and I have travelled the same path and reached the same destination.

I was hoping you'd found some magical alternative for dd.

Seems not. Oh well!