DS (15) is bi. Phase? how do I support him?

[Shannon81]

So I've long suspected that my son would turn out to be either gay or bi from a very young age. Now, at the age of 15, he has come out. Totally fine with that and quite proud of him for having the balls to come out about it.

But how do I deal with it? he has a boyfriend but this boyfriend is technically female (transgender pre-op??) and he's spending lots of time with 'him'. Do I mention condoms etc or leave him to it??

Ask Dan Savage. He is a brilliant source of advice on this subject x

First of all, you are forgetting the most crucial thing here - the fact that your ds trusts you enough to tell you.

Don't get too caught up in the phase or not discussions. Wrt to condoms, yes talk to him. Like you would if he was a straight 15 year old boy. Talk to him about how condoms are not just for penetrative sex but also for oral. Have a box or two in the bathroom that he can help himself to if he wants.

There is a big conversation that you need to have. If his boyfriend is pre op and so still has female genitals and a womb, the possibility if pregnancy could potentially be devastating. This needs to be talked about. Just because his partner is pre op, does not necessarily mean that in the heat of the moment, something won't happen.

I wouldn't recommend Dan Savage - he's known for being pretty transphobic.

Scarleteen is a great source of information. www.scarleteen.com/forum/ultimatebb.php Lots of very honest sex education, and not too hetero-normative.

I second the recommendation for 'scarleteen'. Very informative and just generally sensible.