quick poll - if (as a parent) you.........

[ShadowOfTheDay]

told your teenage daughter (once, just once) to clean off her nail polish before school - because it is against the rules and a letter is sent home every other week setting the rules out -
would your daughter (13) :

a. comply
b. complain and comply
c. not comply
d. scream the house down for 20 minutes about the way everyone wears it, and by not letting her we are stifling her "individuality"....
(I don't think she thought before putting those 2 concepts together.... )
eventually she did actually comply, telling us that we are "just like Hitler was" and she would rather be anywhere else but here.....

it is soooo exhausting this parenting of teenagers lark... pleeeeeeeeease tell me it will pass.......

hahaha..... mine does the blame game too..... whatever happens it will be my fault.....

DD1 and DD3 would probably do b. There would be a huge Kevin and Perry 'it's sooo unfair' scene and I would get the 'everyone does it' line. Alternatively they might come up with some sneaky way of getting past me, gloves perhaps!

DD2 would do a. She's always been much more biddable. She might come up with a sneaky plan if egged on by the other 2. All 3 of them have a dreadful problem with skirts that shrink on the way to the bus stop, and magical eyeliner which applies itself!

DD4 is still at primary but is showing the hallmarks of DD1 and DD3's attitude!

A because she hates breaking rules (but no one has noticed that she wears Chelsea boots instead of shoes-rebel)

B.

But we've been told we are like 'Nazi Germany' here too! Was outraged when we chuckled and agreed that our house wasn't a democracy at all. And yes, you can have a say in everything ....when you are a contributing adult. Apparently this is sooooo unfair!

ds does a variation on d frequently. Just not over nail varnish!

He would also do the equivalent of picking it off on the bus on the way there

and he is only 11!

DD told me that we were infringing snigger her human rights when we took her phone off her in the summer

with the nail polish thing it would be complain and comply it was black eye make up with her though she looked like she was half dead when she got home it had streaked down her face she was being individual (no dear you look like your mascara has run) she doesnt wear it anymore

DD (16) would go for C.

I agree with PPs that this is definitely a SEP issue. Why would it be my problem that she gets detention for breaking school uniform code? I don't have to do it do I?

You have to pick your battles with teenagers. Diving in where the consequences are actually doled out by someone else and nobody but the teen suffers in any way is avoidable grief in my book.

mine would have done D, I gave up in the end, her head of year kept nail varnish remover in his desk just for her, am so glad 6th form college don't have rules about what to wear, it has made my life alot less stressful.