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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

Am I over protective???

16 replies

GertieBassett · 01/02/2014 14:05

Hey I need some advice on this......
My lovely, sensible 15 yr old son has asked if he can travel to Sheffield by train with his 15yr old friend to watch CAFC away match( we live in Bexley, Kent). I'm totally against it as he isn't very street wise and when he travelled to Watford he got lost on the London Underground!!.. We hardly ever disagree (yet) but he thinks I'm being way too over protective. Am I??
Is there anyone else out there that have encountered something similar?
Would really appreciate some advice.

OP posts:

MrsBright · 01/02/2014 14:20

Let him go.

Give him written travel instructions and clear advice about asking for help. But let him go - he'll never learn any coping mechanisms unless he's allowed to actually do this sort of thing by himself.

Yes, we worry our arses off about them when they do this sort of stuff - but at some point you HAVE to start letting go.

MrsDavidBowie · 01/02/2014 14:22

Yes let him go.
Ds 14 has gone to a football match at Millwall today...under strict instructions not to goad any millwall supporters.

Original poster

GertieBassett · 01/02/2014 15:35

Thanks ladies, yeah you're right, I've just got to learn to let go! I was never like this with my DD.... She's turned into a feisty, independent 22 year old! So fook knows why I'm so bloody wimpy when it comes to DS.

OP posts:

specialsubject · 01/02/2014 15:45

let him go, but don't give him written instructions - let him work it out with the internet, write it out himself and you check it.

good exercise in how to plan a journey.

bigTillyMint · 01/02/2014 18:33

Let him go. He is with his mate and they are 15 - should be able to manage it OK!

onlyliveonce · 03/02/2014 15:31

Is there not a official Travel Club he could go on? my DS started to go to away games this season without me (15 then, 16 now) and apart from the local ones always goes on the Travel Club as saves me the worry of missing trains and getting caught up in any trouble. They arrive at the ground with just enough time to have a walk around outside without going to far and get some trailer food (much better & cheaper than food inside most grounds!) and then texts me once inside.

DramaAlpaca · 03/02/2014 15:35

Agree with others above. Let him go.

DramaAlpaca · 03/02/2014 15:47

Just to add, I'd let him go but insist on regular text message updates so you know he's OK.

Original poster

GertieBassett · 03/02/2014 16:30

Ooo never heard of travel club but will defo be onto it now!! Thanks for that ;-))

OP posts:

PlasmaBall · 03/02/2014 16:37

I understand why youre nervous but think he'll be finee. If they get lost they'll gave to find themselves again which will be good for them.

But surely everyone knows there's only one team in Kent and it"s not CA

princessalbert · 03/02/2014 20:55

I'd let him go.
The best way to learn is to do it.

rightsaidfrederick · 03/02/2014 21:57

Let him go. He'll learn, and realistically, what's the worst that could happen? Gets on the wrong train? He'll survive.

OhSoVintage · 04/02/2014 09:31

I must admit Im not sure if I would be comfortable with it. I think it would depend of your DH and the friend he is going with.

That maybe because I have a dd, maybe I would be more chilled with a DH :)

Iwannalaylikethisforever · 10/02/2014 20:08

Let him go, gotta learn sometime,

Innogen · 10/02/2014 20:54

Yeah let him go. Getting lost isn't the worst thing in the world. I'm lost about 40% of the time. I survive.

tammytwigg · 10/02/2014 21:04

Know how you feel op I had to let my Ds 15 go from Lincolnshire to Wales last summer with 2 friends same age for a sea cadet thing ,3 different trains was worried like you ,made him text every different train he got on , he was fine ,was pleased i let him ,they are growing up .

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