I'm 16 years old and not allowed a boyfriend.

[TeenTips]

I'm 16 years old and not allowed a boyfriend. My mum says that I have to wait until university.

In my friendship group everyone is getting boyfriends and although I don't feel pressured in any way to have a boyfriend, there is someone I like, and have been good friends with for a year and a half.

How can I change my mum's mind?

I can almost guarantee that your mother will be a bigger relationship in your life than any boyfriend you have at 16. I'm not Asian, but I agree that 16 is very young, and that your mother is looking after your best interests in this.

Of course she should not control you forever; you should judge for yourself if this particular advice seems sensible. You should talk to her about her reasons, and when she thinks would be reasonable to have a boyfriend. Next year? University? When she finds the right person for you? Then you can make an informed judgement about whether her no-boyfriend rule is right for you.

But don't just rush into a relationship at 16 because all your friends have. A lot of 16-year-old boys are really not worth the bother!! They seem to get better in university (well, lots of them do. Some never do).

I'm sure you'll find a brilliant boyfriend when you are ready, and if you've been able to keep your Mum onside, I'm sure she'll like him, too.

It bothers me when people move to a new culture and expect their children not to be part of the culture they grow up in but that's another discussion...

your mother actually sounds very lucky to have a well behaved teen who sounds quite mature. I had similar problems with Catholic parents and it lead to me rebeling and having a teen pregnancy... In every other way I was well behaved but I couldn't handle the restrictions.

she needs to understand that this is your life and you need to explain to her that you will balance your school life and social life as normal. However I understand she may not listen which becomes hard. I agree with the poster who said there is no reason to assume sex is going to happen, It sounds like the op just wants to not have to sneak around with boyfriends and maybe will think about sex once she's In an established relationship - knowing some of the girls I went to school with your mum is lucky you actually want a boy friend rather than just sleeping with random guys.

at the end of the day unless she stops you going out or has a strict way of checking on you, she can't stop you and If it comes to it you may have to do it behind her back which obviously risks breaking her trust. I don't mean to encourage lying but it was what I had to do at one point and it might be the only option. I hope my kids don't lie to my but then I will make it easier for them to be honest with me by making boundaries more realistic and tailored to the child's maturity.