BBM - I'm a bit shocked at some of the stuff on there

[sandyballs]

I check DD's phone now and then to see what's going on - year 8. This morning there a few messages from a girl I don't know, unfamiliar name, talking about 'sucking dick' and calling someone a c**t. .

Spoke to DD about it at breakfast and she just said she was a friend of hers but she puts silly things on there to look big. I've checked DDs messages and she hasn't put anything dodgy, or replied to this girl.

They are so young! What can I do, why aren't this girls parents keeping an eye on her phone useage? Do I just keep talking and hoping some of my ranting sinks in?

Shocking isn't it ? Pleased to hear that your dd has her head screwed on, well done you.

THat's the problem with blackberries all this stuff is apparently untraceable unlike texts.....

All you can do ( apart from get her a different phone, which clearly ain't an option now) is drill her to show you anything bad- especially where anyone is being bullied or putting themself at risk eg sexually (and practice doing a face that isn't the OMFG which would be anyone's natural reaction), never to respond to bad stuff or start it herself.

A huge number of teens seem to go through a phase - from @13-15 - of using shocking language unfortunately.

Very good advice from Theas18 IMO.

(I had my eyes opened by reading the twitter accounts of some local teenagers )

Thanks for replies. I'll start practising that face , difficult though! I had another chat with my DDs tonight and they said this girl has anger issues which makes her put stuff like that on BBM and other places. Surely if that was the case her parents would be monitoring it at her age.

I also thought BBM was untraceable which is why I'm confused that there are some still on there, can you save some if you want?

Stupid question but how do you monitor BBM? Never had a blackberry , thought it was just like free texting with your friends? Kind of like iPhone to iPhone texts? But 15yo DD seems to be chatting on BBM with people all over the Country. I don't really get it. I've got her Blackberry right now due to her having lost it for abysmal behaviour. Would like to check it but have no clue how.

There should be a little button on the left of the phone, like a quick start key.

Otherwise its in the menu. A black speech box with a blue one behind. If she has put her BBM pin on facebook or twitter then anyone who sees it can request to be a contact with her.

It is just texting though. Any content on there is being put there by the people using it, exactly like texting.