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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

DD15 has no boobs

21 replies

grannyflo · 23/01/2014 11:33

Dd turned 15 just before Christmas. She started her periods at 13 but she has pretty much no breast development at all, just the buds you'd expect to see in an 11 year old. She hides it with padded bras but it is really getting her down, and much as I keep reassuring her they will grow in time, even I am starting to worry! She refuses to go to the GP as she says it's too embarrassing. She is gorgeous, tall and slim and has been scouted by two model agencies which you would think would have boosted her confidence but hasn't at all! She won't go out with boys, although I know she wants to, as they might notice she's a 'freak' as she puts it. How can I help her? Any thoughts please

OP posts:

fanoftheinvisibleman · 23/01/2014 11:38

I'd work on her confidence as much as you can.

Or you can tell her that at 15 I was 7 stone and a 30 AA. Now I am 37, 10 1/2 stone and a 34 DD...we can't have it all!

On a serious note, I do think it is a shame that girls whose bodies haven't developed yet are made to feel this way.

GuernseyTeddy · 23/01/2014 11:45

I think you need to give the expectation that they just may not grow.

If she's having her periods, it's unlikely to be delayed puberty.

I speak as someone who was a 32AA before having my son, and only a 32A now. Some women are less endowed.

On the plus side, I was back in size 8 jeans three weeks after my son was born and now my normal 6/8 size five months on.

fanoftheinvisibleman · 23/01/2014 11:50

I'll be honest Guernsey my neice asked me how you get big boobs (she is teeny as is sil who is a size 6!) and I did say in most cases it is down to body size, hence my point above. I am pretty sure I wouldn't be a 34 DD at 7 stone. But, puberty isn't be all and end all either. I started my periods at 13 too but was in an a or aa cup until I put weight on in my 20's.

Quoteunquote · 23/01/2014 11:54

You need to get her to find a way of not feeling embarrassed about speaking to a GP, a vital life skill, she needs to be able to go to a doctor and talk to them without any reluctance, or she might put off something important.

and she needs to find a way to love the body she got or have a life time of misery.

MrsBucketxx · 23/01/2014 11:58

I had non for years non really through my teens at all. Only when I got pregnant that grew and im a small c now.

Try and work on her self esteem boobs aren't a ticket to looking good.

HappyAsEyeAm · 23/01/2014 12:03

I sympathise, as I was a 32AA all through school and 6th form (and that is a genuine 32AA, not a size which I guessed I was) and a size 6. I crpt up to a size 8 and an A cup in my mid 20s, and to the naked eye, I had no chest at all. I still have very small boobs and I'm in my late 30s. They got bigger when I was pregnant and then after the birth, and they've stayed slightly bigger, but they're still very small.

It used to bother me enormously. I had good self esteem, but I longed to have a B cup (I wasn't greedy). Now I don't think of it at all. Boobs are not a ticket to looking feminine or anything.

specialsubject · 23/01/2014 19:49

Some have big boobs, some have small ones. All can breast feed which is what they are for. We all have something we don't like about our appearance as kids, growing up is about learning that it doesn't matter. Your problem is convincing her!

she's not a freak. She's normal. Listen to quoteunquote, wise words.

who cares anyway? Bras are so uncomfortable! She can be active without bothering with one.

nirishma · 25/01/2014 19:38

I was like this until I was 18 when I went on the pill. I was so self conscious about my lack of boobs that I didn't appreciate what a lovely slim figure I had. I'm 26 now and was a 32B just before getting pregnant and my boobs are bigger now but not saggy at all even after five moths of breastfeeding. Honestly they will grow! Tell her to pm me if she wants. I was part of the triple A brigade too all through my teenage years. Would give anything to have that body back!

If she is desperate, the pill is what gave me boobs but I went on it for contraceptive purposes. Could be a kill two birds scenario in your case.

Original poster

grannyflo · 27/01/2014 15:09

Thanks for your comments. She has been on the pill for six months for really heavy periods nirishma but its a very low dose as she's so young and hasn't made her boobs any bigger! Maybe she can change to a different one when she's a little older. She compares herself constantly to her two best friends, both short and curvy and well developed! I do point out to her that lots of people would love to have her body as she's 5'8" with great legs, abs and bum! Guess we always want what we don't have

OP posts:

hellymelly · 27/01/2014 15:15

My friend has breasts like this, still at 50, and looks like the slender fairy like girl she was at 15. Flat chested can be beautiful IMo. But on the other side, I was an A cup at 15 and a 28F not long after, so things can change!

ggirl · 27/01/2014 15:37

I hated my boobs when I was a teenager. Clothes look so much better on the flatter chest.

FreakoidOrganisoid · 27/01/2014 15:49

I had no boobs at all until my first pregnancy. I wore a 32 aaa then a 32a. After my first baby I wore a 32b for a while, until I got properly measured and found out I was a 28d. My boobs are still small but they don't bother memuch at all now, I think I've just accepted I'll always have small ones (which I know is impossible for a 15 year old). Finding out I was actually a d was also a big psychological boost, silly really as they're still the same size they were before, just the label is different!

amumthatcares · 27/01/2014 21:46

My DD (now 19) was/is exactly the same. She is a size 6 and has never had boobs and at 15/16 was adamant she was going to have a 'boob job' as soon as she could afford it.

It was a big issue for her at 15/16, especially as all of her friends were well endowed. We were told Yasmin contraceptive pill helped boobs grow so she even went to the docs to go on that just for that purpose, but they didn't help.

She has always used good gel uplift bra's. Debenhams do a good one called 'ultimo' and they are the only thing that make her look like she's got any sort of bust. I don't think she's so conscious about it now and she doesn't really mention it that much, so hopefully the 'boob job' idea will be forgotten.

specialsubject · 01/02/2014 15:48

I would say to flag up the obvious, that we don't all look the same - does she worry because some of her friends are taller? Shorter? Have different coloured eyes? Of course not -so why worry about bumps on chest?

that said, most teens do all want to look the same - flattened greased hair, tons of scary slap, reeking of perfume. Fortunately it passes.

AnyFucker · 01/02/2014 16:02

show her articles like this

so who wouldn't like to look like this then ?

specialsubject · 02/02/2014 11:28

I wouldn't, vacant expression and knickers showing.

Mintymoomoo · 04/02/2014 21:54

I also understand how she feels, I to started period at 13 but my boob just didn't grow, I was 28aa, nothing wrong I just wasn't going to grow any, my 3 big sisters all got nice C cups but they are all a heavier build than me, I was 5"7 at weigh 8 stone size 8, and I still am now at 34 years, even having children didn't change mine in the slightest and I got implants in my early 20's taking me to a DD cup! I'm now confident in my body!

It's very sad looking back that small breast can make you feel so unhappy I doing the padded bras, chicken fillets everything

I really feel for your dd

Cezella · 04/02/2014 22:02

For what it's worth- I was an AA throughout school and at the age of 16 mine appeared almost overnight (rather embarrassingly!) way way after I'd started my periods and I now have bigger boobs than all the girls who used to laugh at me, so it does happen-

However, I think it is a lot more important to learn to love your body the way it is, and would concentrate on boosting her self esteem more than I would on the actual breast issue! I know lots of women, some are tall, some short, some have large breasts, some with no breasts but they all have beautiful bodies in their own way- just different! There are also down sides to having large breasts- clothes don't fit very well a lot of the time and you have to dress carefully, strap them up for sports etc. I know it's easy to say this when I'm no longer in the position but I yearned for breasts for years and it's only now I have them I see that it really wasn't worth even worrying about!

cjbk1 · 04/02/2014 22:08

Please don't say that 'breastfeeding is what they are for' to her my mum and grandma said that to me and it gave me so many issues I think about it daily to be honest; I'd like boobs for myself for the rest of my life and them saying that made me so resentful I even decided not to bf first child in protest-seriously, I did see sense since tho, bless you OP for seeing her lack of boobs as a possible concern it's more than my mum did.....I could go on.....

ATacticalNameChange · 04/02/2014 22:12

How she is now is no guarantee of anything. I had bee-stings at the age of 15, having started periods at 13. I'm now 37 and a 38 GG, Eek.

Catsmamma · 04/02/2014 22:13

i didn't have any bosoms till i was 28 (and pg) ...also 5ft8 and very slender

I have them now, and and still 5ft8 but considerably less slender.

Upside on not having big bosoms is they are still fairly pert even at the grand old age of 47

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