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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Quick poll re piercings

39 replies

ChristmasBigKnickers · 30/12/2013 14:54

My DD is 17 and a half. She has two piercings in each earlobe and wants a third in one earlobe. She told me about it this morning. I was non committal- didn't say yes or no but that it was inadvisable.

DH is livid and has asked me why i didn't say no.

Is it really my place to say given her age?

OP posts:
Middleagedmotheroftwo · 30/12/2013 15:02

I'd prefer that to the nose piercing my DD2(18) wants to have.
personally I say "my house, my rules), but you do have to pick your battles - is this one of them?

Claybury · 30/12/2013 15:02

I wouldn't worry. If you forbid it she'll do it anyway.
My DS wanted his eyebrow pierced at 15. I said wait until after summer holidays in case it gets infected, he was pretty annoyed for a week or so but luckily he hasn't mentioned it again.

Most piercing places require you to be accompanied by an adult if you're under 18 though - why don't you say yes it's her choice but wait until you're 18.

Original poster
ChristmasBigKnickers · 30/12/2013 15:05

I think I would say no to a nose piercing and we have stood fast on the belly piercing too. But one more hole in her earlobe is really not worth a fight over. She can take it out for school ( where she would not be allowed to wear it) and for uni interviews which she has coming up.

OP posts:
Travelledtheworld · 30/12/2013 16:46

I would say wait until you are 18 and pay for it yourself.

HermioneWeasley · 30/12/2013 16:47

It's pretty minor in the world of piercings.

I had (I think 2 in one ear and 3 in another). I don't use the holes now and I managed to get a respectable job when I left uni?

dexter73 · 30/12/2013 17:58

Why is it inadvisable to have a third piercing in one ear? If you have 2 in each ear already I can't see that one more is going to make much of a difference. Universities won't care about ear piercings.

punny · 30/12/2013 18:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 30/12/2013 18:01

Agree that taking earrings out for university interviews would be unnecessary.

Deffo better to have 3 in ears than one in nose, imo.

Dontletthemgetyoudown · 30/12/2013 18:05

I'd not make a fuss either. They are more likely to get it fine if you say no. Ds1 is 16 and wanted to get his ear pierced I think he thought I'd say no way but I offered to take him to the piercer so he wouldn't have any problem with id. We got as far as the town centre before he said he wasn't sure and needed to think about it some more Grin

Helpyourself · 30/12/2013 18:06

I've always said yes to belly button as if they grow out of it, no one ever needs to know.
I agree about 17/18 being at the limit of you having a say.

(As an aside I had a lightbulb moment the other day. Mine are mid to late teens and I feel I've got a rapidly diminishing time in which to influence/ mold/ 'whatever non Machiavellian verb I'm looking for' them. I can't say 'I hate your fiancée' in 5 years time, but I can guide them towards making good choices now.)

olivevoir58 · 30/12/2013 20:12

Piercings close and disappear, tattoes don't. I go along with the piercings but am battling (and luckily winning ATM) the tattoo...and my dd is only 16. She has had her belly button done twice and both times have come to a drastic end, the last time when she had her appendix out and it had to come out for the op. Also 2 lip piercings that didn't last due to not being able to get them back in once she'd taken them out. So out of 2 belly button piercings, 2 lip piercings and 2 piercings in both ears and one piercing higher up her ear, she generally wears absolutely no body jewellery at all. Ever. (Though she has bought a nice pair of earrings for NYE). Piercings are not worth the battle. Tattoes are a different matter. For me anyway

Mrsfluff · 30/12/2013 20:34

My DD is 13 & I'm happy for her to experiment with various ear piercings, I won't however agree to any facial piercings. IMO ears will heal over if they get fed up of them and can be covered by hair, but facial piercings can often leave noticeable holes.

chocoluvva · 30/12/2013 21:00

Your DD is six months short of being 18....

It's fine.

usualsuspect · 30/12/2013 21:02

She's 17.

Why is she asking you?

Weeantwee · 30/12/2013 21:09

I think at the age of 17 it's up to her and a third ear piercing isn't that bad. I know someone who had their nipples and lady parts pierced on her 18th birthday! Be thankful.

Rosencrantz · 30/12/2013 22:21

It's fine. I had 3 per ear at 21 and got a wonderful, city banking job after graduation.

livinginawinterwonderland · 31/12/2013 07:18

There are more important battles than ear piercings.

I only had one set of holes until I left school, because my school was really strict and made you take out any other piercings. I'm 25 now and I have 11 piercings - 3 in each earlobe, my nose, my tragus, 2 in my right cartilage and my belly button. I can easily take them out for work or job interviews if necessary, and it's never held me back at work before.

They're not in the same league as tattoos. They can be taken out and most people don't notice empty holes in your ears. I often leave studs out of my third set of holes and they're barely noticeable without jewellery in. Let her get on with it - there are MUCH worse things she could be doing!

TheOneAndOnlyAlpha · 31/12/2013 07:24

I think I had 5 or 6 in one ear at some point. I took them all out bar one after uni. Can't see the holes at all.

specialsubject · 31/12/2013 19:46

ear piercings are the only holes in the head that don't look like spots. Huge stretchers look ridiculous but normal studs/earrings are harmless enough, and I don't think employers etc object.

AnUnearthlyChild · 31/12/2013 19:50

I'm with living

I have 8 piercing a in my ears, lobe and cartilage.

I am prepared to take them out for work and interviews, but never have never bothered yet. Don't think it's affected my chances.

mathanxiety · 01/01/2014 03:04

Why is your DH livid?

At 17 I think this is a non-issue. It's not a cartilage piercing or belly button or nose, or tongue or any other places mentioned here that give me the willies to even think about let alone type ..

And as mentioned - it's not a tattoo.

FWIW, DD1 (23) has three piercings in one ear and two in another and it has never been an issue for getting into a very selective university or a great job afterwards.

SoonToBeSix · 01/01/2014 06:16

Usual , probably because she is not an adult.

livinginawinterwonderland · 01/01/2014 11:23

Yeah, but you don't need parental permission at 17. So she has no need to ask her mum.

sebsmummy1 · 01/01/2014 11:27

At seventeen I was pretty much doing as I pleased and had piercings everywhere, so I am impressed your daughter asks you permission to be honest. You've done well!!

I think another piercing in the ear won't hurt. I only keep my belly button piercing now, I had three in my nose that you'd never notice and two in one ear, three in the other. I never wear earrings anymore and the only holes you would notice are the ones in my lobes.

WorrySighWorrySigh · 01/01/2014 11:32

DD(18) has a couple of cartilage piercings as well as lobe piercings. She is an intelligent adult currently studying for A levels.

Her advice:

  • go to a reputable tattoo & piercing place (tattooing will mean the hygiene rules are far more stringent)
  • freezing will help with pain
  • dont go to Claire's
  • dont ever let anyone do cartilage with a gun (it can shatter cartilage)
  • avoid ear stretching (it smells, it hurts and can twist over)

They are your DD's ears.

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