Maryrose. After finding similar stuff with my daughter age 13. Videos, photos, Skype, whatsapp, snapchat, texts, instagram, bbms - we approached softly softly, believeing that she could have been led into it and got caught up with it. We changed numbers, stopped bbm, got rid of Skype, and all the rest. We thought she had known the dangers, but went through everything again. Including that it is permanent, everything can be recorded, screen snapped etc, she can be blackmailed over it with them saying they will tell or show people. Asked her how she would feel if someone found out family wise etc., she said she wouldn't like it. We are a close family and have always said come with any worries, we do stuff together, she gets stuff, but also has to save and pay for things herself. She knows we love her, care and want her to be safe.
After thinking it had stopped, as she told us it had, we found that SHE had started it up again, SHE had found numbers that had been gotten rid of, SHE was now sexting and actually SPEAKING on the mobile to them. This was all AFTER we had spoken to her, reiterated the dangers etc. I had been blaming myself and wondering what on earth we had done wrong to create this mess. It was/is not us, it is HER. She is texting a boyfriend, about 12/13 who we know nothing about, he lives miles away, goes to school miles away. We have said no phone use after 9/9.30pm. She says she doesn't. We got itemised phone bills and see that she is texting him up to 11pm, sometimes later. She thinks he is not a stranger because she met him a couple of times with another boy. She wants to meet him this weekend, maybe friday evening after school but more probably sunday. She tells us lies constantly, and when we ask if she is meeting someone she will say no. The thing is, we are not overly strict, but not push overs either. We are fairly young and remember what it is like to be a teenager. We wouldn't have such a problem with her meeting a boy that we know at least something about, or know a parent that may know his parents. She cannot see that it is not safe for anyone, sometimes not even an adult, to be meeting up with people you hardly know. S she seems to have stopped the more serious stuff, do I just let her get on with this boy, again explaining the facts and dangers? This is my situation.
Do you know any other social networks she is using. I could very well be the mother of the daughter that has a Facebook account but her mum doesn't know. I really don't know my daughter myself anymore. Do you know how heartbreaking that is?
I can take everything away, I can talk and advise till I am blue in the face. I can love and care for her, but until she realises it is wrong, it won't stop for good. She says now that it has, and I have to try to believe her or I will go mad. But the obsession with chasing and harassing, from what I can see, boys is ongoing. I realise that boys tend to be blamed as the chasers, it doesn't seem to be that way in our case, so I can't actually blame him.