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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

My 16.5 yr old wants 2 was holiday w pals to Aiya Napa

31 replies

Melanie1971 · 14/09/2013 22:16

My daughter will b 17 when she wants to go away w 9 pals to Aiya Napa from Scotland. Am I being over protective by wanting her to go for just one week as this is a first break abroad on her own and is this destination safe? I thought Magaluf might be better but am being told its worse? Help appreciated...I have a meeting w other parents tomorrow

OP posts:

flow4 · 15/09/2013 07:30

My DS1 announced a holiday in Ibiza at about the same age, when he was 16.5 and the friends he planned to go with were 18. I pointed out he wouldn't be able to go drinking and clubbing like everyone else, because passport ID would be needed, not the dodgy fake ID that works round here and his would show he wasn't old enough. Then I bit my lip and kept my fears to myself. His 'plan' went no further...

dexter73 · 15/09/2013 08:15

I would think a week would be long enough because it is very expensive when you get there to go drinking and clubbing. My dd's friend spent £700 in a week!

louby44 · 15/09/2013 08:27

I went to Magaluf when I was 17 and my friend was turning 18 a couple of months later. This was in 1987. It was 'full on' then and we got drinks with no problems.

I suppose looking back then we were pretty sensible, mature 17 yr olds but it didn't stop us having a good time.

But after I watched The Inbetweeners film I said my kids were NEVER going on holiday on their own till they were 30!!!

Good luck

Viking1 · 15/09/2013 10:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SirChenjin · 15/09/2013 10:36

As Viking says, if she's funding it then it's up to her - and she won't be able to drink.

I have a 16 year old, and he knows that I won't fund one single penny of a trip to AN, Magaluf or anywhere similar for a week of drinking, but then I am a mean mum

Chopchopbusybusy · 15/09/2013 10:42

I think it's naive to say that she so t be able to drink because of her age. I'd be willing to get she will get served in lots of bars and even if she doesn't there will be enough willing people to buy drinks for her.
Are there any over 18s going? If it's a package then either an 18 year old will have to be the person making the booking and accepting the booking conditions or a parent will have to take responsibility.
Personally, as the mother of teenagers, I'd just say no.

SirChenjin · 15/09/2013 10:43

OK - drink legally

Original poster

Melanie1971 · 15/09/2013 10:48

Yes there are 18 and 17 yr olds and they plan to drink hopefully responsibly. I have said I will pay for part of the trip depending on the cost but spending money for two weeks self catering plus drinks and trips will be a factor especially when they only work part time. Thx for all the posts so far!

OP posts:

SirChenjin · 15/09/2013 10:51

You don't have to pay for it if you don't feel happy about her going, you know

heidihole · 15/09/2013 10:53

I did 'that' kind of holiday aged 17 and 11 months.

A weeks enough. Seriously. Hungover, sunburnt, skint and tired by the end. Fun tho!

FaddyPeony · 15/09/2013 10:54

God I'd not be on favour at all tbh. 2 weeks is a long time, there will be friend bust-ups etc and at least one person will run out of money. I know what I was like at that age: not totally wild but had enough of a glint in my eye to get myself into loads of trouble! I am only a parent of a toddler so dreading the teen years already, I don't envy you making this decision. Personally I would want dc to wait until very nearly 18 before going on a party holiday abroad like this.

FaddyPeony · 15/09/2013 10:55

But if she does go I really think week is plenty long.

secretscwirrels · 15/09/2013 11:22

I wouldn't want 17 year old DS to go but..
It was a lovely resort when I last went 25 years ago but is now devoted to clubbing.
They can drink in Cyprus at 17.
This place got a really bad reputation a few years ago but I believe they have cleaned it up and trouble is rare compared with Magaluf.

specialsubject · 15/09/2013 11:25

she will be able to drink - no-one checks or cares. Measures are much bigger there and there is lots of peer pressure to get hammered. Her safety will be in her hands.

there is no reason to go to the kiddy-drunk resorts other than to get stinking drunk and have sex, they have no other attraction. The 'trips' are just drink fests under another name.

stock her up with condoms, remind her to watch her consumption, to stay off mopeds and remember that travel insurance doesn't cover drunks.

most kids survive it, of course. Some get raped, lots get chlamydia, some end up with big bills for medical treatment and the occasional one dies because they do something stupid under the influence.

teenagetantrums · 15/09/2013 12:20

I wouldn't let my 16/17 year old DD go, well I couldn't stop her but I wouldn't pay for it, she just isn't responsible enough, her behaviour here is risky enough without being that far away. I know they would run out money and expect me to send more as well.

valiumredhead · 15/09/2013 12:55

Why is it up to a 16 year old of they have the money? An 18 year old is an adult a 16 year old can be told no if you don't think it's appt. And imo at 16 that is not an appt holiday having done it myself

valiumredhead · 15/09/2013 12:56

Basically everything special said.

Viking1 · 15/09/2013 13:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

Melanie1971 · 15/09/2013 13:42

Thx for helpful info, I am meeting parents in an hour for some of the girls and will share this with them. When your daughter is old enough to leave home and have sex it's important to work with them to reach a solution. Her safety and well being is my main concern and I would rather we have an open and frank discussion. I have let them drink responsibly under my roof where I can see what goes on but am still on the view a week is enough thx :)

OP posts:

littlemisswise · 15/09/2013 13:52

DS1(18) went to Malia with his friends this Summer. Some were 17, they can drink. He wants to take DS2 next year who will be 17. He won't be going. He can go when he is 18. It is causing no end of rows at the moment but I hated every minute DS1 was in Malia but I don't think DS2 is mature enough.

YoureBeingADick · 15/09/2013 13:55

" I pointed out he wouldn't be able to go drinking and clubbing like everyone else, because passport ID would be needed, "

you knew this was rubbish though, right?

OP one week is no safer than 2 weeks. it'll be just as risky from the day she lands til the day she leaves.

flow4 · 15/09/2013 15:03

The point is, HE believed it!

webwiz · 15/09/2013 16:30

One week is enough - DD2 went to Malia for a week after A levels with a group of girls and one of is now an ex-friend because she behaved so badly. DD2's verdict was it wasn't as much fun as she thought it was going to be.

YoureBeingADick · 15/09/2013 20:32

true- I'm amazed he didn't already know it wasn't true or that his friends didn't set him straight when he told them that was why he wasn't going. there are so many that go at 16/17 now that it's very hard to get away with that sort of lie. they'll all know someone who has been.

frenchfancy · 16/09/2013 06:28

I'm sorry but there is no way I would let my DD go. For those saying you can't stop them just remove their passport.

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