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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

How much do your teenagers help around the house?

41 replies

Mindfullness · 13/09/2013 16:00

I have 2 teens 15 and 14 and they do nothing and apparently none of their friends help at home either!! What do your teens do and do you give them pocket money?
Tia :)

OP posts:

YeahWhat · 14/09/2013 11:48

I have older teens.

They do the dishes,
cook for themselves several times a week (and clear up after themselves)
help lay table
sort laundry,
Change beds
mow our big lawn (takes over an hour)
unpack and put away all shopping,
go shopping for bread,milk etc,

sometimes help with decorating or bigger gardening work
keeping their own bedrooms / TV rooms tidy.
Not much 'cleaning' as I have a cleaner.

In terms of time it's not much but at least it is something some of my kids have to be asked others do it off their own back.

woollyideas · 14/09/2013 11:54

Mine does nothing whatsoever, apart from making the occasional cup of coffee or tea. She was way more helpful when she was younger and would regularly clean the bathroom, run the hoover around, etc.
I buy her clothes (the essentials), toiletries, pay her train fare to college etc., but give her no allowance or pocket money at all. She knows she could have pocket money if she did specific things in the house: make a meal once a week, wash up once a week, take the recycling out every day. She chooses not to do any of this, so I choose not to give her any money.

FernieB · 14/09/2013 16:20

My DDT's (13) don't do an awful lot, but keep their rooms tidy and make their beds without ever having been asked. They also put their laundry away and keep their bathroom tidy (I have had to badger them to do this).

They cook from time to time and will make cups of tea for me (usually when they want something). They will set and clear the table when asked. They'll do pretty much any chore if I ask, but as they have a lot of homework I don't ask too much of them.

secretscwirrels · 14/09/2013 17:52

They don't do much but they do know how and will do anything if asked.
Both of my parents were at work all day and often out in the evening. I was made to do all washing, my laundry, cook for us all every night and housework when I was 13 and I hugely resented it.
I only work a few hours so there is no way I would sit at home all day doing nothing while they were at school and then expect them to do it.
They both work very hard at school and homework. I am happy with them doing stuff like table clearing, ironing, grass cutting etc, but not all the time.
Pocket money is not linked to jobs

TaudrieTattoo · 14/09/2013 18:00

Very little. They will if asked, and if I pay them.

The younger one is far more willing, however.

The older one has to be coaxed to do EVERYTHING, from getting up and getting dressed, to opening the gate so I can drive the car through, to getting changed, doing homework, coming off the internet, surrendering the remote control occasionally and going to bed.

It's a bit exhausting, tbh.

Flicktheswitch · 14/09/2013 21:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DalmationDots · 14/09/2013 21:45

They clear the table after dinner
Clear away all their plates after meals when I am out at work (e.g. in holidays) completely including washing up
Must completely tidy up if friends come over/they bake cakes/make their own mess
Help put washing on the line
Keep rooms tidy
Never leave dirty cups/plates etc anywhere
Absolutely must make their beds each day, I have made them do this since they could walk practically so it is pretty ingrained in them! I have a pet hate of unmade beds.
If I ask them to iron/put washing on/bring washing in from line etc they must do so without question
When they arrive home from a holiday/uni they must do their own washing (I might help them hang it out but it is up to them to ask me :D)
DS puts the bins out and helps with any DIY, gardening or setting up gadgets!

Mine are uni age though but have done this since about aged 10. I am a single parent who works full time so have distributed things like this mostly to help make my life easier and smoother, and it does them no harm :D

ThePuffyShirt · 14/09/2013 21:52

Why are parents paying children to do household chores? Is it not part & parcel of family life to help out?

Original poster

Mindfullness · 14/09/2013 22:09

I am going to sit down tomorrow and organise a rota :) I don't see why I am still making beds for children taller than me :D As for paying for helping I guess everyone/family is different. I think it's good to get used to having to earn money so for us it will work well (hopefully)

OP posts:

DalmationDots · 14/09/2013 22:16

Never paid DC but their pocket money, when they were younger, was always conditional on them doing those things...along with generally being nice and respectful etc
Every family is different though.

Ineedanewone · 14/09/2013 22:25

Set the table, clear away, stack dishwasher and clean the kitchen, ( if you cook for others in this house, you don't wash up!)
Bring down and sort the laundry, put clean clothes away and are in charge of sorting their own pit, I mean bedroom,
Walk thedog,
Help unpack the shopping
Keep the living room half decent, put the hoover over if asked.

Edithmark · 14/09/2013 22:47

My teens make own beds and keep own rooms tidy, including sorting own washing and putting away the clean stuff (I do the actual laundry and hang it out as I am home during the day). Help with minding younger siblings whilst I cook or pop to shops. Occasionally cook. Help with DIY and car maintenance (cos they like fixing stuff). I try not to be on their case with too much else as they are both working hard for exams and do long days at school (8-5.30), plus loads of homework.

£10 per week pocket money into their banks. Expected to buy own social life stuff from this...cinema, train tickets, burgers when out etc. often supplement this with extra cash as we live miles form anywhere and it costs loads to get nearest big town for any kind of shops etc.

Pocket money can be docked for any stroppy or rude behaviour...not had to do that too often so far.

Def. expected to dip into own funds for big purchases eg if want big present for birthday eg Ipad then they pay towards it from their savings. We are not high earners!

Edithmark · 14/09/2013 22:50

Oh and def. help keep all communal areas tidy...I do make a big deal over this...no fun going to sit down in the evening in a sitting room full of crisp packets, orange peel and dirty mugs. Plus trainers kicked under sofa cos couldn't be bothered to put them away. That really does drive me loopy.

SoonToBeSix · 14/09/2013 22:51

Sidge I don't think that's particularly long, my dd leaves at 7.15 gets home at 5.50. She does around 45 minutes of chores a day. She doesn't have homework though that's done during school hours.

Sidge · 15/09/2013 13:06

Soontobe I know it's not a hugely long day compared to some, but she then has her homework to do when she gets home. But then her chores only take up to half an hour so she gets off quite lightly really!

If she'd been able to get a place at our catchment senior (at the end of the road!) then her school day with travel would be 0810-1510 - and I'd have to find a lot more chores for her!!

KatyPutTheCuttleOn · 15/09/2013 15:50

Mine does what she's asked to do; usually this is the dishwasher and taking laundry upstairs which she dumps on the floor carefully hangs up. However she has been known to add a few things to the dishwasher and start it again, that didn't last long though as she didn't enjoy the consequences (not having clean stuff because she'd not emptied the dishwasher completely and then there were no cups until the cycle had finished).

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