but it's your fault mum (light hearted)

[readyforthehills]

I love my son dearly but he's driving me insane.

Statements from teenagers

I didn't touch him
What?
It wasn't me!
It's not like I asked to be born!
Seriously mum you have no idea
There's never anything to eat in this house!
Whatever!
Fifa blaaaaaaaaah

The petrol gets used but strangely it's none of their doing. Clearly all the times they're using the car it functions on pixie dust.

The money tree in our garden has always been a helpful boost to family finances. Other parents have a limitless source of wealth, perhaps they cultivate entire orchards.

This autumn DD goes away to uni. I know she'll cope as well as her DBro but I shall miss them so much.

We've had the opposite this summer. Ds (13) was away for 4 weeks and we suddenly realised that:

the biscuits were still getting eaten when they shouldn't

the living room was still a mess

towels still cluttered up the hall and

the sink was still filled with unwashed cups

I reckon he must have sneaked back (from Sweden) sometimes when we weren't looking

DD2 is fond of -
"You can't make me" (oh, I think I can)
"What are you going to do about it?"
"Oh GOD mum, you're SO embarrassing"
"There's nothing to DOOOOOOO"
"I haven't got anything to wear!" (said whilst looking at a whole wardrobe bulging with clothes)
"Have you washed my black top?" (no because it's under your bed in with the heap of other dirty clothes)
"Everyone else is allowed to.." (insert ridiculous idea that no sane parent would let themselves do, let alone their 14 year old)

But best of all, I dropped DD1 (17) at work at 6.30am this morning, pulled into a parking space and I get "don't park there, that's the manager sitting there, they'll SEE you!"

I suggested that she might find walking the 3 miles home less embarrassing

GCSE coursework left on the kitchen table on the last possible day it could be submitted.
I had of course reminded him to pick it up and take it. But it was my fault! Because...

I did not make sure he was Listening

How they behave is my fault. Apparently I have missed the boat and because I didn't expect them to eg pick up their socks at 5 years old they have now passed the point of learning how to do such things!

Aged 3 my DD could wash up and put the dirty clothes in the laundry bin for all 4 of us.
Aged 34, yes 34 years old my DD hasn't a clue what the inside of the dishwasher looks like to load or unload it. Her dirty clothes are either on the bathroom floor or the landing. Yes she still lives at home.

Me: "now that you and your sister Re out and about independently do much, how about us all agreeing on one night each week when we're all at home to spend time together as a family?"
DD1(18): "I can't really see the point".

Oh, the ingratitude of youth!