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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Should I Allow 16yr old to go out and possibly get drunk on Leaver's Day? (tonight)

7 replies

biscuitsandcheese · 07/06/2013 13:12

My 16yr old Son wants to go out tonight in the nearest town with his friends to celebrate leavers day. He says his friends will be drinking but that he won't. I don't really believe that if i'm honest. I haven't been told any details, times, who's going etc.

I'm really torn if i'm honest. I do want him to have a bit of freedom and it's a local tradition. Myself and his Aunties have all done the same and that's probably why i'm worried because I know what we got up to!

He's a sensible boy and gets himself to and from the city every weekend. He's just come back from a week away with his girlfriend and her grandparents where he had to manage a 3hr train journey alone. He doesn't hang around on the streets drinking. I have let him drink a little bit on special occasions. He doesn't really cause much trouble for me except being lazy and his bedroom being a health hazard.

He doesn't have any minutes left on his phone so he wouldn't be able to ring me if there was a problem and me ringing him every 5 minutes isn't going to go down well. He does have form for switching his phone off on occasion.

His grandma lives in the town so he could walk to her house if he had any problems. I'll be at home tonight and I won't be drinking so I can pick him up.

What would you do?

OP posts:
CouthyMow · 07/06/2013 14:07

Has he got any texts left? If he was in trouble he could text you?

I don't think you should stop him from doing something that is so much of a local tradition that you and his Auntie did it.

He is 16. He will no doubt be drinking, but then so were you. It would be a shame for him to look back when he is your age, and NOT have the shared memories with his friends of his leaver's do.

Just my opinion - as the mum of a 15yo where I am slowly having to 'let go' and let her make her own mistakes to learn from. I'm finding it ruddy difficult too...

biscuitsandcheese · 07/06/2013 15:18

Thanks I've found a way to top up his phone. I think I'm going to let him go.

OP posts:
Yonihadtoask · 07/06/2013 16:04

Yes. He has to go.

Just think how lucky we are now though that our DC have mobile phones and can call if they are stuck.

I was wild at that age -but couldn't have phoned home for a lift (def no mobiles in the 80s!!).

my DS is 15 now, and I am quite pleased that he is a stay at home type. Phew.

Startail · 07/06/2013 16:08

We did! Long before mobiles were invented so I'd be a total hypocrite if I said anything.

ajandjjmum · 07/06/2013 16:23

Brings back memories of DS and his friends going out for the first time on GCSE results day. He's now 21 and has survived. Grin

Hope they have (sensible) fun!

biscuitsandcheese · 07/06/2013 16:59

Thanks, he's just gone. I topped up his phone but it takes two hours to work. Hopefully it'll be working soon.

I did the same with no mobile phone. I lived in the town though so could walk home. I snogged the boy I'd fancied all through school and he walked me home. I invited him in and was so drunk I fell asleep on the sofa. My mum was far more laid back than i am. When I woke up in the morning he was gone and I've never seen him since. I did hear he went to prison for gbh so it's probably a good thing.

Ds said I'm overprotective because I didn't want him wearing pink skinny jeans and I wanted to know the names of the people he's going out with.

I just have to keep my fingers crossed that everything goes ok.

OP posts:
CoolStoryBro · 07/06/2013 22:33

It's perfectly normal to ask who he's going out with! I do too! I'd have ignored the pink skinny jeans though.

It has completely taken me by surprise how I parent my 16 yo. Even though I guess we all look back at our rather wild youths with some fondness, when it comes to our children, we just don't want them doing the same thing. They seem so young!!

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