maybe depressed 12yr old girl?

[bibidybopity]

My daughter is an extremely bright, lovely girl who is usually very happy and enthusiastic.
Yesterday she told me that she felt maybe depressed and that she didn't see the point in trying at school anymore (she used to love learning, did extra work in her free time ECT.) - she said this was partly down to her grades dropping (which she has only just told me about) - she got 12\20 in history and 28/40 in English, she used to get 85percent plus - but she doesn't know what else it is down to
She also told me that she feels really fat - she is 12, 5ft6 and 6stone. But I cannt seem to get through to her that this is not fat. She also told me that she has been skipping breakfast and lunch.
What should I do???
Any advice helpful

see her GP I would be concerned about the beginnings of an eating disorder. If she is not eating well she will not be able to concentrate properly, grades will drop, mood will flag and depression will set in, its a vicious circle. She is talking to you so that's good, keep talking and listening. Mood swings are common at this age and hormonal changes can cause young women to feel a bit odd but not be able to understand why perhaps talk to the school with her to see if they have spotted any reasons for her drop in grades.

Thanks
She has only been at the school since September and these are her first exams there.
im starting to doubt MYSELF, is 6(ish)stone fat??

Why would you think 6 stone at 5'6'' height is fat? How does she look - thin, healthy, what?

I just put her height and weight into an online BMI (body mass index) checker which puts her BMI at 13.9 which shows her as severely underweight

You need to take her to your GP very soon and discuss all of this with the GP. Get the GP to take her weight.

They can refer to CAMHS if needed.

Thanks selks
I'll make an appointment for Monday.
What will the gp be able to do?
I also just saw on her bank account that she has been buying energy tablets ECT. To make up for lack of food?

she is 12 and has access to buy tablets herself actually this really worries me more about the food disorder issue, 6 stone is not fat it is underweight as selks says. GP may refer her to CAMHS, suggest an educational psychologist, counselling and may talk some sense into her about the importance of good nutrition / healthy body weight etc.

The GP will assess to see whether she needs help in terms of her mental health - i.e. feeling depressed and possible eating disorder - and will refer to CAMHS (child mental health services) if needed. The GP should also monitor her weight - best practice would be for the GP to refer to CAMHS if needed and to offer regular appointments to monitor her weight and eating behaviours in the meantime.

Glad to hear that you are taking this seriously. Do go to your GP and if they refer to CAMHS do make sure to attend there too. It sounds like your daughter needs help.

In the mean time give your daughter lots of praise for coming to you with this and offer her lots of support and time (but no pressure) to talk over what might be on her mind. Try and have meals together such as breakfast and make it a pleasant time together; offer her food that she is likely to eat and encourage her to keep up her food intake but don't allow it to become a battle ground. At the moment she just needs gentle support, but do access any input from GP / CAMHS.

I'm a CAMHS practitioner by the way and we often treat difficulties such as those your daughter is experiencing. Any questions about CAMHS I'm happy to answer. Best wishes.

Mindfulmum is quite right that for some CAMHS services there can unfortunately be a wait, but most CAMHS would offer a more urgent appointment if things are getting worrying. If you find yourself waiting for a CAMHS appt the thing to do is keep accessing your GP particularly if you are worried, and they can often speed things up.