what age to you let them take charge of their own haircuts

[eatyourveg]

ds3 (14) want to have his hair shaved. (not off completely but a very short squaddie style Number 2 sides number 3 on top) Just interested to know in a quick yes or no. Would you let your ds decide themselves?

AtiaoftheJulii I deliberately wanted a quick yes/no as I just wanted a straw poll to avoid going into the specifics or raising the controlling / right to expression issue which I knew would be a hot potato. Just a would you let your dc get a number 2/3 if they wanted yes or no.

tabulahrasa I appreciate your post. I think we have reached a compromise but until we see just what a 5/7 looks like we won't know. I have no idea on clipper lengths.

oddslippers - I'm going out shopping today and ds has asked for a pair of grey or black non jeans (denim) trousers. I'm going to Top Man, River Island and Burton to find a pair but he would probably be just as happy with a pair from m&s classic menswear or milletts. I'm pretty confident he doesn't register whats in and whats not one bit. I try to get him the same sort of stuff that I see my students in.

Thanks again for the responses

DS has 3 on top, 2 on the sides.

He looks fine, as he's in the TA, and he's mixed race. He's had afros before and they were really messy looking but he loved them.

He had it really short as it looks stupid with a beret if he has tufty bits sticking out!

1 is pretty much to the scalp, 3 is about 3 mm.

i don't even know if there is such a thing as a number 7? don't they just cut with scissors after a certain point?

but if you want a 'yes' or 'no', then at that age 'yes'. the only issue would be if school said 'no' to a number 2. in which case it would have to be a 'no'. although quite what they would do if you did send him in with a number 2, i don't know. how would they even know it was a number 2, unless they measured it? they wouldn't expect you to keep him at home until it grew a few more mms!

Each grade is 1/8 inch - about 3mm.

Eatyourveg - so then everyone said yes, he's 14, let him have what he wants, and you came back and told us why we were all wrong when it came to your son! If you found that helpful, then great.

Fwiw, my 12 year old asks for a short back and sides in the barber's (was there last night with him and they have finally stopped asking me about his hair, as I just direct questions back to him) and they do a number 4 on the back and sides and then cut it with scissors to about an inch on top. So a 4/7 would look completely respectable imo, though possibly not as cool as you want him to look!

atia I didn't come back to tell you that you were all wrong and if that is the impression you too from my post then I apologise. I came back because you asked me a specific question and I didn't understand the point lljkk was making. I am grateful for all responses and yes I did find them helpful.

took not too

If I left it to DS (aged 14) he would never get it cut.

So I organise the hairdresser, he tells her what he wants, which is generally, "what you did last time".

I didn't mind my own son deciding what haircut he wanted. I was a bit though, when his friend went with him, and told the hairdresser to give him a weird haircut - which he did. At least that was what my son told me.

But hair grows quickly.

I think my son was eight or nine when he was in charge of his haircuts - or rather lack of them; he wanted long hair. Before that age he was not interested.
The only rule is that he will have checkups if headlice are suspected.
He is sensible enough to not do anything that would get him into trouble at school.