recommend me a book about growing up for my 14-year-old dss

[pecans]

I just bought my dd a book, and would like to get one for dss. I don't think his mum talks to him about growing up, and dh hasn't either. He's emotionally mature and going through puberty, but more into football than girls at the moment. Any recommendations?

The Usbourne one is good. I think it might be called 'What's Happening To Me?' There's a version for each gender as it covers things specific to puberty.

Thank you - will have a look.

At 14 I think it's a bit late. Hell have had everything he needs from mates/google etc.

The what's happening to me book is good, my son is reading it but he is 10!

I would say that at 14, someone ought to be talking to him about this stuff. If his mum isn't doing it, his dad needs to step up.

At 14 he is perfect age to read Living with a Willy (here). But I would get his dad to give it to him, I imagine he'd be mortified if it came from a mother figure.

X-post with Maryz :).
I have browsed LWAW in shops, it's pretty straight talking, blunt the way dopey teenage boys need to hear.

As a mother of two teenage boys I also recommend LWAW. We have a well thumbed copy .
14 is a little late for some of it but not all. He doesn't have to been into girls to be suffering the huge rush of body related worries that can affect boys.
I found there was a gap in the stuff they did at school around age 11. DS1 complained that he knew all about girls periods but nothing about boys' bodies.

He knows the facts of life, of course... but I just have the feeling that there are things he isn't comfortable talking about, and that don't come up naturally.

And yes, I agree it is probably best to get DH to hand over the book.

Many thanks!

Have looked up LWAW, but it has very mixed reviews, mostly due to the suitability of the content. A question for those who have read it: what age would you say it's suitable for? DS1 is nearly 13, so a little younger than the OP's DSS.

Thanks Maryz, I was wondering about getting it when he turns 13, but also looking at The Teenage Guy's Survival Guide by Jeremy Daldry.

The Daldry one looks fab - the Amazon description says it's about not fitting in, which I think dss is feeling atm.

And I really appreciate your post Maryz - I don't know many parents of teenage boys and - as dss isn't mine I find it hard to judge his needs. Both books should cover all the bases I think!

Pecans: is that first base, second base etc?

I have heavily browsed LWAW. I wouldn't give LWAW to an under 13 unless he was obviously full on in puberty anyway. I have been a bit shocked to see it recommended to 9yos on MN. I think my 13yo (relatively mature & interested in girls, too) is still a bit young for it. But perfect for most boys age 14+. They are already trying to think about & cope with those things but don't know how to articulate them. I would not mind DS reading it now, but I suppose he'll get more out of it if he reads it for first time in a year's time, or so.

There is a lot in it about not letting sexual desire drive you to distraction. Willies having a mind of their own. It's pretty blunt, but also totally practical (totally male approach).

I agree about the content of LWAW. My DS1 at 11 was in full on puberty at primary school, probably the only boy in his year. He was physically years ahead of his emotional development. However those physical questions needed addressing so I gave him the book.
I gave it to DS2 at 13.5.
I don't know whether my DH is typical but he was hopeless when I asked him to explain some stuff to DS. He claimed to be unable to remember.

While you're all here, does anyone have a pubescent DS that complains of testicular pain? He doesn't want to go to the doctor about it but it's been happening intermittently for over a year.

maryz hmmm, not sure. I would assume he wouldn't share the book with her- or that he'd leave it here!! If she saw it and didn't like it she wd just take it away from him - She and dh have confiscated the odd thing that the other has given dss (the last thing was the face wash we bought him as she doesn't like chemicals). It doesn't ususlly cause a row though I guess there is potential here!! But dh thinks it is a bit much so I might have to stick with the other one anyway.

Yes DS1 did have exactly that, 3b1g. Included sporadic swelling. He was checked out by consultants but they decided it was probably normal for him, discharged him, & said to get back in touch if things got worse (they didn't).

I would persuade him to get it checked out, bribe him if necessary. He can insist on only male doctors having a look, if preferred.

Thanks lljkk.

3b1g I remember DS1 complaining of it. He also got painful lumps around the nipple which the GP said was normal.
This is exactly what I mean about the lack of information in school sex ed about what boys can expect in puberty. They teach all about PMS and period pain but not about what boys can expect.

squirrels that's exactly the sort of info I think dss needs to know about.

Thank you squirrels. I don't have any testicles and DH said he doesn't remember ever having this problem. It's not the sort of thing you can ask friends in real life. All the GPs at our surgery are good friends and DS knows them socially and spends time with their children, so asking one of them would be beyond awkward for him.