DS 17 sleeping over at girls house, advice needed

[Rennie12]

My DS went out last Saturday and didn't come back until the morning (he had text me to tell me of his change of plan, but I'd fallen asleep!)
He hasn't done this before and now wants to stay over again this weekend. It was pretty obvious what he'd been up to. He was on cloud nine when he got in, to put it mildly.
On the one hand I feel if he is safe then I'd rather he stay over but on the other hand, he hasn't known this girl for very long at all and I don't really agree with him sleeping with someone who he's not obviously serious about.
I'm not sure whether I should let him stay over at hers this weekend. I wouldn't let it happen under my roof, but next year if he goes to Uni I expect he will be out every night!
What would you do?

Hmm. Tricky. If you forbid it, they will no doubt find somewhere less salubrious to do it. Hard as it may be to recall now, it is technically possible to do 'it' in the day time as well, so I'm not sure that there is a great deal you can do to stop them having sex.

What you can do (which I am sure you have started already) is drill into him about the importance of safe sex and respect for his sexual partners. Remind him that contraception is as much his responsibility as hers and that honesty and openness is important in any relationship, particularly a sexual one.

You never know, he may be wildly in love with her, only to find that she's the one who's more interested in a casual fling!

Buy him a packet of condoms, and emphasise that if he doesn't want to be a daddy, he should use them.

At 17, you can't stop him staying out, you can only hope you've taught him right.

Good luck.

Be happy for him?! If the girl lives with her parents and he is being welcomed by them, that's good - much better than them sneaking around and shagging in bushes and bus station toilets. All teenage relationships have to start somewhere, and imo, their own beds are the nicest, safest places.

How old is the girl?
Agree with the safe sex and respect for partners messages, although it should be part of his understanding by now anyway.

Thanks for your replies. She is 17 also. Naturally he's had all the responsible/safe sex/ respect talks. I just felt it was a bit hypocritical having said in the past I didn't want girlfriends staying over, to then say it's fine to stay over at hers.

He's 17 OP and old enough to have a sexual relationship. You are entitled not to permit it in your home but if the girlfriends mum allows it, that's fine.

Sorry at work and that reply seemed a bit blunt.

I'm also not at all sure if I want to hear my son's sexual activities. We live in a small flat