Please help. I can't think of anything else to do. Nothing works.

[Faith8]

I have supported my 14 year old daughter in everything. Everyone else has given up on her. I don't know what else I can do. Initially she was bullied - resulted in schoolphobia - to cut a very long story short I am taking her to kidscape in London at the end of March - with a treat to see Chicago in the West End - something that she wants to do, not me (although I will love it). She stayed out last night at a friends and is refusing to come home until 10.00 p.m.. Her tutor is coming in the morning and she hasn't done her homework. Im think she may also be suffering with P.M.T.. I am trying not to make any more excuses for her but along with this I cannot see what more I can do. Everyone is telling me that I am wasting my time taking her to London as she will not change. Money is very limited (in order to travel I have to forego my monthly mortgage payment) and I am actually beginning to think that perhaps they are right. I really do not know what else I can do. Please help!!

Hi Faith, I don't have the answers for you but didn't want your post to go unanswered. It's quiet on here tonight so you may not get many responses, but if you post on this thread again tomorrow it will bump it up for the daytime crowd and hopefully someone will have some advice for you.

Wanted to add, don't give up on her! Having been a wayward daughter myself, I know the worth of a mother's unconditional love :)

No answers I am afraid, but I too was a wayward daughter and looking back I hate to think how my Mum and dad must have felt.
They never gave up on me though and since my mid twenties we have been so close. I think the world of them and deep down knew they were always there for me.

I think its good you are taking her to London. It may not solve all your problems in one go but as others have said, its a clear sign to her that you love her very much.

What about a trip to the doctors if you think she having PMT probs?

its hard to advise on your post as your not very descriptive. the only negative behaviour i got from it was that she hasn't done her homework?

please elaborate

I've got a wayward 14 year old dd as well, so I do sympathise faith8

Whilst the London trip is a lovely idea, I don't think you should miss a mortgage payment to do it - won't that land you in a stressful situation with your mortgage lender?

sometimes you just have to ride it out until they are 16.

dont miss your mortgage for it - it wont be appreciated and its not going to solve anything in the long term.

Oh god, I missed the mortgage bit!, dont do it, but do something together regularly.

Can you tell us a bit more about what the problems are?

By the way, Kidscape can sometimes help with travel costs to their office where help is needed - and it is, if you need to miss a mortgage payment.

If the problems are the sorts of matters that need extra support from professionals, have you sought any local help from services? There are a multitude of charities and psychological services around that people are often unaware of. Your GP might be a good place to start.

Could this be the SECOND thread I seem to have killed?! How are things going Faith8?