Hi everyone, this is my first post.
I have 2 DDs 11 and 16. After a very difficult 2 years or so (general teenage attitude etc) my DD1 has now more or less settled down and our relationship has become a lot closer recently.
She's always described me as being over protective and thinks that I worry far too much, this is probably true, and due to my own not very caring parents I find the balance at times a bit tricky.
Over the last 6 months or so her friendship group has changed slightly and she's with a really lovely bunch of friends most are a year older than her. She brings them to the house, and they all seem comfortable chatting to me and her dad and hanging out at our house and I also vaguely know a few of their mums and dads....so all good and well so far.
During the last couple of months she's been 'seeing' one of the boys in the group....he's a lovely boy who's 17, he's very polite and doing really well in 6th form and if I could have chosen a BF for her he would be the one.
The thing that bothers me though is they had sex a couple of weeks ago (her first time) and she told me about it the next day, all sounded lovely, protection was used, and he asked her several times beforehand if she was sure... still all sounds good, but when I asked her if they were actually in a 'relationship' now she said no still just 'seeing' each other. Is this normal behaviour for teens these days?
I'm now finding it really difficult to 'butt out' and not keep asking her when she's next seeing him, if he's texting her etc. In my day you flirted then the boy asked you out you said yes and then the romance began. I feel like saying to him ' how come my daughter is ok to have sex with but not to have a relationship with?? (of course I won?t) My DD said that they want to take things slow and not rush into a relationship (more him than her I feel) I just don't get it ????? It just seems so casual to me. My DD has had lots of admirers but has been very choosey, has lots of self respect and is pretty sensible (thank goodness) and this is her first serious relationship, and as she's been seeing this boy for a few months now I know this wasn't a spur of the moment thing to happen between them. I asked her that when you're just 'seeing' someone is it ok for them to 'see' other people too, but she just laughed at me and said 'don't worry mum, he won't.'
Don't know why it's such a big deal to me and am I worrying about nothing here??