low self esteem

[chunni]

i raised my daughter with a lot of effort and care, instilling in her values and provided her with a good education. She is 18 now and looks good. She has had low self esteem for the last 10 years, at least. I suffer from depression and lose my patience after reassuring her time and time again. I feel like I have damaged her somehow despite trying my best. I wish I could help her.

You can help your DD by doing what you do best - caring, loving, teaching her (even though she's 18) what's good and right. You haven't damaged her. You really haven't. It's all too easy to think like that (I know).

Has anything happened in her life to give her low esteem? Is it as low as you think it is? If she's at school or college, is there anyone there she - and you - can turn to? What about CHAMS (before she hits real adulthood - wish my DS has got help from CHAMS rather than the adult version in our area)? Would she talk to anyone?

Are you looking after yourself/getting support?

But please don't beat yourself up - and at any moment, you DD could turn the corner ...

This is absolutely not your fault, chunni. You sound like a great mum. In my experience, self-esteem seems to be linked very strongly to friendships. Does your DD have good friends around her?