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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

DD 16 wants to go to a festival with a friend ...

18 replies

MissGreatBritain · 21/03/2012 21:59

I'm not sure what to say really. They are both sensible, have both camped a lot (but not alone). Her friend is already going to another festival with a different friend, so am I being a bit PFB not letting her go? What should I be concerned about? I've never been to a festival, so have no idea of how it all works. Thanks.

OP posts:
dexter73 · 21/03/2012 22:07

Which festival is it?

MissGreatBritain · 21/03/2012 22:21

Reading

OP posts:
knackeredknees · 22/03/2012 04:06

Why wouldn't you let her go?

DS and pretty much all his year are going to Reading, it's a rite of passage. There are threads on Reading every year on MN, do a search and get a list of the do's and don'ts. I think a lot of them set fire to their tents at the end Hmm so don't send her with a decent one. I think another bit of advice I saw last year was for them to take a cheapo mobile so it doesn't matter if they lose it.

knackeredknees · 22/03/2012 04:08

btw she'll have to get a move on re. tickets, ds bought his a week last Monday when they went on sale and I think most will have sold out by now.

AKissIsNotAContract · 22/03/2012 04:10

My only concern would be how expensive it is. If the cost isn't an issue I'd let her go, she'll have a great time.

knackeredknees · 22/03/2012 04:18

yy, ds paid £205 for his ticket.

Geranium3 · 22/03/2012 15:24

my daughter went to her 1st festival at age 15 and whilst i was nervous about letting her go, iwas reassured that it was in only 20miles away(boardmasters in cornwall)so could get there quickly if necessary and somehow being down here it felt a safer atmosphere, would still have qualms if she wanted to attend reading. She is back to boardmasters this summer for the 3rd time!

MedusaIsHavingABadHairDay · 22/03/2012 17:21

Mine all did Reading for the first time at 16... and had a great time! If she can get a ticket, and afford to get what she needs (a very basic tent.. they leave them there usually) she will survive and come back absolutely filthy but happy!

Even my DS1 survived and he is NOT sensible in any way whatsoever Grin

DD2 went last year for the first time and she is one who shuddered at the thought of the toilets, and being dirty..and she has already got her tickets to go again:)

I'd say let her go :) (Viagogo do tickets later but they are more expensive btw)

flow4 · 22/03/2012 17:45

I did Reading at 16, thirty years ago... You're bringing back some great memories! Grin A group of us went - about ten kids I think... I shared a tent with my boyfriend, we listened to music and got gently inebriated, and the sun shone the whole time (in my memory, anyway!)...
I think you can assume there will be sex and drugs on offer, as well as rock 'n' roll, so you need to trust your daughter not to push her limits and/or your rules toooo far. But I would add that I think festivals are very safe indeed, for reasonably sensible people - cos if anyone has any kind of problem at all, there are hundreds of happy, friendly people around to help :)

MedusaIsHavingABadHairDay · 22/03/2012 23:12

Agree with FLow4.. DD2 did say that she doesn't remember the first night due to the amount of alcohol she consumed.....but on the plus side it meant she wasn't cold in the night:)

DD1 found a naked man in her sleeping bag a couple of years ago (she's 20 so on her 4th year there) and turfed him out ! She also got swine flu one year and came home scarily ill..refused to come home before the end and had a temp of 104 and glassy eyed with illness.. but STILL went back the next year!

I think it's a brilliant experience for them, and am slightly jealous that I feel too old/knackered/incontinent Grin for going myself!

UTR · 23/03/2012 08:53

Let her go and stretch her wings.

DD1 went to her first festival last year, aged just 17 (end of Year 12). As someone else said, it's a rite of passage. All of her huge group of friends camped together and partied together and she told me she felt entirely safe the whole time - everyone was so friendly.

She could put up with the messiness/ dirtiness/ foul loos/ crap food, excess alcohol, drunk people staggering around day and night for three days but was very, very relieved to get home to a hot bath and clean bed. This is all part of it... I sensed that, as she went off, she was desperately wanting to prove to herself and the world that she is a grown-up, independent young adult and, sure enough, she made a success of the experience. However she was VERY happy to flee back home again to a clean and cosy house and Mum's healthy home cooking after three days of eating and living amongst rubbish.

I agree with others:
DD got a cheap-as-chips tent from Tescos and left it there.
Definitely don't take a good phone - dig out a crappy old handset
Nearer the time, post again asking what she should take and you'll get all the info you need.

The other thing that DD said was a definite lesson for her for next time was to be picked up to go home at the end of the last night, on a high, after the last performance. She said that by then she had had enough and was ready to leave. Waking up the next morning surrounded by filth and mud and litter and wasted people was the low spot of the whole experience. She said the whole site just looked like landfill. Quite how the logistics of that would work, I don't know - I guess they'd have to pack up all their stuff into bags in the morning and leave everything in the tent ready to collect and then be picked up.

DD is really glad she went because it was an experience/ rite of passage and she would have felt she was missing out if all her friends had done it without her.

This year she only wants to go for the day though!

mumblechum1 · 23/03/2012 10:34

How do they get their alcohol? DS is going this year and I suspect he will be trying to smuggle some in in the time honoured fashion (vodka in water bottles etc), as they're under 18?

DamselInDisarray · 23/03/2012 10:37

I went to Reading at 16, and Glastonbury. It was great.

Mumblechum: they don't check what you're bringing on to the campsite (or, at least, they didn't back in the day), only into the bit with all the stages (where the bars are incredibly overpriced).

MedusaIsHavingABadHairDay · 23/03/2012 11:47

Actually they are pretty strict with alcohol..under 18's will not be served or slowed to take it in. But of course once in there if someone else of legal age buys it there isn't a lot you can do! My three older teens ll went together with a big group so there were over 18s there buying alcohol. However I wasn't unduly worried as dd1 wouldn't let anything dire happen to dd2 :) After the first night they were all too tired to bother they said!

IloveJudgeJudy · 23/03/2012 19:40

Agree with letting her go. DS1 went last year after GCSEs and has already bought his ticket for this year. He's also bought an Early Bird one so that he can get a good pitch. Agree with getting a cheap tent as they all seem to leave them there Shock. They probably will be able to smuggle alcohol in if they want to (DS and all his friends did). DS also did that drinking loads on the first night and sleeping with his feet out the tent. It rained and he got wet! I was surprised that he liked it so much as when he's here he'll have one/two showers per day and is always very, very clean. At Reading i don't even know if he changed his pants (bleugh).

The only thing I would say is that she makes sure that the friend she goes with is a very good friend and that they stay together most of the time. It is pretty safe there afaik, but DS said he was glad that he always had someone in the group to go around with. Also agree with don't take anything of value. Someone did rifle through DS and his friends' stuff in their tent, but they had nothing of value and what he did have he kept in a body belt on him at all times (or in the bottom of his sleeping bag). He did have a couple of people open the zip of the body belt at different times, so just moved away from them.

Actually, I'm quite Envy as I've never had a chance to go to anything like that.

mumblechum1 · 23/03/2012 20:14

I was just talking to ds about this tonight and he says someone he knows smuggled half bottles of vodka in in Pringles tubes, carefully arranged so that if the tube was opened the vodka was hidden by Pringles.

Whether he thought about the weight issue is another matter Hmm

Milliways · 25/03/2012 17:21

DS is 16 but one of the youngest in Yr12, so most of his friends did Reading last year (we live in Reading).

He has worked since last April (was 16 in August) and this year, to make up, he has already bought tickets for Reading and V, and today got tickets for the Radio 1 Hackney weekend!

DD did Reading a few years back and had a great time, apart from the last night as they were in "the wrong" field in the year all those crazy fires were started. She said if she went again she would pack her stuff, bring it home on the last morning, go back for the music and we would collect at 12/2 whenever. Same offer goes for DS but there was no trouble last year and his friends all know where to camp to avoid all that.

Milliways · 25/03/2012 17:24

There is a MASSIVE tesco walkable from the site that does a great trade in boxes of lager/cider etc from all the festival goers.

DS says that this year they are supposed to get a free burger and drink each day with a weekend ticket?

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