Not coping very well

[tan3517]

I feel like I have had the week from hell. We have been having problems with my 14 year old DS behavour for a while now which is affecting our everyday lives. He's permantly on report at school, talks to me and his dad like . I was given a verbal warning on Tuesday for underachieving at work and another meeting in two weeks - which I believe is going to lead to the sack. My husband has been in his job for 14 years and has been told he could be made redundant shortly. So we have so much worry in our family at the moment and I really want to try and sort it all out.
My son plays for a top club football academy and he is getting a review next Thursday. This has too been a very stressful time because my husband works in the city and is up at 5am and trys to get home to take my DS to the football academy twice a week which after his trip home from work he then has to travel another hour out to the club. We have supported our DS since he was 7 years of age with his football and he has always wanted this or led us to believe he did. Travelled to Chelsea/Arsenal etc for games which is about 2 half hours on a Sunday. Put our life on hold all these years, and he has just turned around to me this morning and says he doesnt want to do the acaemy anymore he wants to go back to local Sunday league football. My husband and I are distraught and feel like we have been kicked in the stomach. My husband has told him if he gives it up we will not run him around every sunday to games.
I can't seem to get him to see the bigger picture. I would like him to stay on until the meeting and carry on to see at least if he gets another two year contract. He isnt having any of it. I think he is being very unreasonable and has no idea what he will be throwing away.
Please, please mums can you give me some advice :(

Honestly I wouldn't quit work
It's not going to help the situation if both of you find yourselves out of work
Plus if you get dismissed you can claim job seekers allowance but you can't if you resign

tan I feel for you. Am experiencing similar with our DD atm but on a lower level, thank God.
You must hang on to your job. Grovel a bit, try harder, promised you'll put the effort in. Your DS must not see you throw the towel in or jack it in just because things are tough. That could give him the wrong role model.
Your Dh must be so tired after all the travelling.
Hang on in there, please.

Good Morning, I just wanted to post on here to let you know hopefully things are looking up.

After a lot of thinking and tears I gave up my job and am a lot happier in my own self, and have been able to concentrate on other things.
A week ago my son told me that he did not want to carry on with his championshiop football academy as he was under too much pressure which is why he hasnt been doing very well at school and just purely a nasty child. He has been out of football since Septemeber. We have told them now and they didn't want him to leave. However upset and disappointed we were (trust me after seven years-and knowing he has a talent!) he has been a completely different child this week. i havent had to raise my voice at him. I asked him to do something and at the moment he does it. He admitted that he was lashing out in everyway because he was unhappy with the footy. He now wants to go back to his old team and play and have fun. :)
My husband also got made redundant after 12 years but we have managed to set up our own company and do what he was doing before and I do the paperwork.
i certainly hope things work out, but all i can say is from my experience yes sure you have teenagers that go through the stroppy stage but what we had was horendous, but there was so much more to it.
Fingers crossed things will get better, I just wanted to share it with you all xx

Thanks for the update tan. Looks like you found a good solution to the warm problems and I'm glad you were able to talk to ds. Hopefully you will all be in a happier place from now on. I am really pleased for you. :)

Thankyou, it has been a hard few months but sometimes you just have to let go and hope for the best. We cant guarentee success on any of it but it has made our life and our sons life so much happier which is all that matters. Keep youre fingers crossed for us! :)