Is it possible for a teenager to be too close to a parent?

[OrmIrian]

DS1 is very affectionate to me. Always giving me hugs, asking me if I'm alright. Which is nice. He likes to spend time with me (and vice versa) Problem is he is getting less and less fond of DH. DH struggles with him and doesn't much appear to like him - does a lot of shouting and criticising. I am perfectly happy to admit DS's faults but I still think that overall he's a decent sort. I have had so many conversations with DH about the way he disciplines but he thinks I'm too soft, I think can be a bit bullying and will never admit when he's wrong. I promise to back him up, but there are times when I just can't. He never seems to soften his attitude.

One evening DS1 and I were helping DS2 with his maths hw. DH called, DS2 answered the phone and called out' It's dad, he wants mum'. DS1 muttered 'You can't have her, she's mine'. Which was odd even if meant humourously.

Is this just a normal father/son power struggle thing. How do I help them get on better. He gets on OK with DD - she thinks he's a bit of an embarrassment but she thinks I am too and I think that's fairly normal for a teenage girl. it's good-natured and easy-going. DS2 is still only 9. Should I make DS1 back off a bit and spend more time with DH?

Aww. He sounds lovely. I don't think you can be too close to a parent - perhaps though it is normal though to be closer to one parent than another. Perhaps DH and your son clash a bit.

I think it's lovely that you are close. It must be upsetting for you when they bash heads, though.

Thanks - he is lovely (pita as well at times of course)

DH didn't have a dad around at this age. Maybe that's the issue here.

That's quite odd, but at 9 it sounds ok, I wouldn't be worried unless it carrys on into his teens, then he might not have as much independance as other kids, though by choice, which you dont particularly want/ But for the next few years it should be fine. :)

Thanks tinker, but it's my 15 yr old that I'm talking about

But he is very independent- goes out a lot, does things out of the house.