indecent images..again...what do i do?

[febel]

Seen there is another thread on this...have found images of my daughter's new boyfriend (14, same age as her)..relationship a couple of weeks old....on her phone with his c**k fully out ..and I mean FULLY. Found she had nicked sister's condoms too the other day, tackled her about it and she says she did it"just in case", and "doesn't want to do it at all until she is older" One, she NICKED them, and not the first time she has taken stuff frm sister, and TWO, sorry, and I know a lot of pple think very differently, bt 14 to me is too young to be having sex. Her eldest sister did it at 16 and she says was too young and wishes she hadn't (21 now) youngest is a very good liar unfortunately so don't realy beleive much in what she says. My problem is also that she is due to go to boys house on Monday, says his mum is in when I asked (before I found any of the above out) Already had a history with him before they went out cos I had found him sexting her on her phone, and I texted him and warned him I knew and not to do it. Do I tell his parents? Another complication is his sister is in a class I work with (I do educatinal support) tho I don't work with her (she is 17)

I don't know what the right thing to do is, but I would be going around to his mothers house, and showing her the picture of his willy.

He must be really stupid to have done this...it only takes one little forward button.......

Why would anyone do that? Take a photo of your cock when you know it could be forwarded.
I would ask your other DD to keep her condoms in a well hidden place and ask your younger DD for the stolen ones back.
She would not be going to his house on Monday either.

I too would go to the parents of the boy, and possibly involve the school

Thought I would bump this, I'm sorry I don't have any advice - I am dreading the teenage years, hope u get some good advice and get it sorted x

As he knows you look at your DD's phone, do you think that this is an act of defiance because they know you will find it?

Agree with Kreecher - she should not be going to his house.

I agree that you should show the picture to his Mum.

She says his parents are in..or at least his mum is. I do know where they live, and his mum has arthritus and doesn't go out much..they are a decent family. Mind you...who knows what goes on upstairs...pple an be in and you can be quiet?! I hate the teenage years sooo much...seems to be one thing after another nowadays with my yd...never had all this with my eldest and middle daughters (19 and 21) but then I suppose camera phones and texting weren't as common then..or the dreaded facebook. Feel sometimes I want to stop the world and get off and leave them all to it!
Have had a VERY long and serious talk with youngest daughter,but still don't know what to do. She says she told him she didn't like him sending the pic to her ("What did you do that for..it's weird..yuk!" was what she said she told him) but as I pointed out, it was still on her phone. No, I shouldn't have snooped but then she shouldn't have stuff like that on her phone should she? Who knows what teenagers have on their phones? Reiterates that she doesn't want to have sex etc..I still don't know whether to let her go to his or not. Perhaps I'm soft, or guilable but I think I believe her...I suppose I want to believe her. She is such an idiot, I always catch her out and she never seems to learn. Think if she does go to his however (is being picked up by his mum i now found out) it won't be a super long visit and I will ensure I have land line number.

I can't honestly believe that you believe your DD. She sounds to me, and I apologise if I am overstepping the mark, as if she does want to do the sexing. Why keep a picture of her BFs knob on her phone. Is it a status symbol that she can show her friends (shades of Dappy).
If she is that keen to see him, why can't he go to your house tomorrow? Can you connect her phone to your computer so he is confronted by his cock as he comes in.

I suppose I beleive her cos I want to...she is downstairs at mo, in hysterics, crying and saying I'll ruin everything, and that he was sorry her sent it as soon as he did, and she forgot it was on her phone. I suppose I'm guillable and can see both sides, and you like to believe the best of your kids cos you bought them up in what you thought was the right way. Mind you, it's also other ppls kids who interfere with the way you bought em up and introduce them to other things etc It upsets me when my kids are upset, and to be honest I could have done without it today.

I often want to believe things that my DD says. Luckily, she's not yet 11. IIWY, and obviously I am not, I would be really putting my foot down and saying she isn't going.
I don't believe her, but I am not you clearly.

VERY sound advice Maryz.

Concern about taking condoms away is of course that if she goes ahead and has sex without one.

never thought of that.

Thanks Maryz...think will go down that path. Did ask her and she says seh did send a photo of her in bra and shorts but that was all. Think will check tho...good idea. Feel so upset and mixed up about it all...you want to believe and trust your own child and their friends.

although it sounds irresponsible, i would let her go over to his house, but talk to her and tell her how you feel. if you stop her going there, she'll just resent you for it. you could suggest him coming to yours, but really i think you just need to talk to her about contraception and how young she is etc