I have two teens; I love them both. They are both bright, friendly, lovable people. However one is organised and the other isn't. I'm generally a happy, smiley Mum to the organised one, and an irritable, snappy, fed-up Mum to the disorganised one. How can I change this? Yesterday, for instance, disorganised put a pair of trousers into the wash with dirty tissues in the pocket. I reckon I've told him not to do this approx once a week for the last 5 years. I can't have told him less than 200 times not to do this. I've even, on occasion, stuck a notice above the laundry basket. Yesterday I did think I'd checked, and found dirty tissues in two of his pockets. But I missed a third. And so, yesterday, yet again, I was picking bits of tissue off my washing and, not for the first time, I lost my temper.
Other people are posting about problems with drink, drugs, sex, parties, and I realise this seems trivial. But I haven't had a single day in over a year when I haven't been really bad-tempered to Disorganised about something (missing school bus, lost homework, leaving banana skins in the fruit bowl, biscuit wrappers dropped on the floor, lost school tie, lost bus pass, dirty mugs left lying about, taking a phone message but not writing it down on the pad next to the phone and then forgetting about it....) It's all things I keep on saying! If someone phones, write it down, on this pad here, using this pen - how can a teenager not be capable of that???
How do I get out of this endless cycle of irritation and bad temper with disorganised teen? My relationship with organised teen is great; warm, relaxed, happy, fun.
(FWIW, it's not just at home - Organised teen is never in trouble at school, but Disorganised is frequently in low-level trouble over homework handed in on the wrong date, or he read the wrong chapter, or he forgot altogether; again, he keeps being told at school; write in down in your homework diary, check your homework diary every night, don't lose your homework diary, but somehow on it goes.)