Is it bulling or hormones

[EndoftheroadMum]

My son is 14 yrs and only just going into puperty. He has two sisters one a year younger and one of 23. Unfotunately my son has been hit with all the little problems a boy could have. He is small, very thin, has freckles, strwaberry blond hair, very bad teeth which affects his speech (brace to be fitted next week) poor hearing due to ear infections also ITP which is a blood condtion which makes some activties difficult. He does not see hhis friends outside school and that is not throught lack of trying - they do not want to be with him it appears. He really is a lovely boy if a little immature for his age. My sons would be happy on the x-box but also still running round the woods with guns and climbing trees (childhood is so short) Kind, caring and does help required. But yes he has changed. This may just be teenage years starting but the behaviour is about the temeper tantrums and the way he twists conversations that in the end I get confused as to what I did say. I appreciate they all want X box and computers on all the time and I do allow a areasonable amount. He has been unhappy at the school for some now with a lots of his circle and others picking on him because of the above conditions. Now doing GCSE's so more pressure on him. I fear the bulling and contant getting on at him is getting him down but do not know how to stop this. I have said I will speak to school but he says it will only make it worse - which I am sure it will.Unfotunatly I always say home is the happy place and where he is safe but bacause of his bahaviour this is not happening and things are being taken away. Anyone with similar experience and how did you deal with?

Hi there, I have a son the same age and he at times has quite bad temper tantrums that I think are down to a combination of hormones/girls/thinking he is 20 when in fact he is 14/GCSE stuff etc etc, so the temper problems could just be the usual stuff.

But you have mentioned that some in his circle are picking on him.....is this an ongoing problem or can you not really get to the bottom of it?

I understand his and your reluctance to speak to school but if things are getting unbearable for him something has to be done. What about ringing his form tutor in confidence first of all? My son had some problems when in Year 7 and what I did first of all was to draw his form tutor's attention to it and ask him to monitor things without my son's knowledge. Would that be a first step or do you think things are too far down the line and that you need to intervene further?

Not sure about the bullying- it's a tricky one to deal with.
But for your son's personal sake it sounds like he could do with a bit of a self confidence boost. Is there anything he enjoys which he could take up as a hobby? Climbing/ karate/ swimming. He could mix with a new set of kids at least out of school and there is usually such a mix of children who don't know each other so children/teens are more accepting of each other and they're usually too busy having fun to bully!
I feel for your son though. I was a freckly, buck toothed kid and it's hard at that age to realise that life does get better! School can be a misery.

Thanks for your replies