13 DD ambulanced to hospital and kept in overnight for drinking vodka on new years eve

[meercatmum]

DD was left at girl friends house to watch DVDs and have sleepover. We were contacted at midnight via Facebook that friends parents had gone out and they had raided drinks cabinet drinking vodka baileys wine. My Dd was violently ill and unconscious so her friend was trying to get advise on FB and we were told by friends children who alerted us. By this time friends parents come home from new years eve party and called ambulance. We took taxi to her at midnight and she was kept in overnight. Thank god she was discharged at 11am with no permanent damage. DD has anorexia and mild aspergers where she feels that she needs to fit in and so the drink affected her more than her friend. Today she is very hungover and sorry for herself saying she will not drink again .... She has not drunk before. Comments

Glad she is home OP.

At 14 a friend and I did similar with whiskey, we were both so so sick that even 30 years on neither of us can touch the stuff.

I don't think you can place the blame at the other parents tbh, they were perhaps a bit naive, but shouldn't have to lock their alcohol up

I imagine the host parents have also had a terrible shock too

They shouldn't have to lock up booze from 13 yo's

The 13yo's are at fault here

From nothing more than being teenagers of course, but really if you trusted thm enough to let your dd stay there, then you were equally as responsible too

and it may have been the OP's dd that was actually the main instigator !

I have spoken briefly to host parents just to let them know she is home and ok apart from a hangover from hell but said I was a bit exhausted to discuss it but said we will speak further tomorrow. In all honesty I think it was out of character since there was only the 2 of them .... Would I have locked away drink if it had been at our house .... In all honesty I don't think it would have crossed my mind as dd has hated any taste of alcohol and it was not as tho it was a party. Obviously I will always now ensure alcohol is locked away ... Ironically I was more concerned about 15 DS going to a party!

I wouldn't lock away alcohol if I were you. It almost sends out the message she is trying to get hold of it when, as you say, it's a one off. She's learned her lesson. You might just manifest the behaviour in her you are trying to avoid.

really, spider ?

have we never been seen together on the same thread ?

Agree its the teens that are at fault here not the parents.

Also agree that its worth having a chat with the teens about not looking for advice on fb but calling parents etc even if they're frightened they might get into trouble.

The alcohol probably affected her more because of the anorexia.

Interesting....

MollieO I'm with you on leaving 13 year olds unsupervised, but then I always think the worst will happen, not because I don't trust my DD's but personally I think it's too young for my child . Others may have more mature DC's.

Thankfully we don't have a drinks cabinet or any strong stuff around so the temptation isn't there.

So exhausted due to lack of sleep last night thought i put on an update but must have not saved it. Have spoken briefly to parents to tell them she is ok but will have proper talk re situation tomorrow. Do not really blame them as do not think I would have locked drink if tables had been turned as it was not a party and dd never shown any real interest in alcohol - do not think it would have crossed my mind. Obviously will not let future opportunities occur... Ironically had been more worried about 15 DS going to a party ....

Sorry just found my previous post will get some sleep now and review postings tomorrow am. Thanks for all input it helps.....

Teach her and her friends how to put someone unconscious in the recovery position - look up the Keep The Party Alive red cross ad on YouTube.

meercatmum sorry to read about your dd. I'm sure it was a terrible shock for you all and a big lesson to be learnt by both the girls involved.

Two weeks ago a young 16 year old boy died from drinking vodka at a party. Apparently they were playing a drinking game and in total he drank 3 bottles. He went outside for some air and was found dead in the snow. His friends tried to resuscitate him but to no avail. His blood alcohol was 4.5g (legal limit here in France 0.8g). It has been a big shock to my ds who knew this poor boy.

I'm sure both girls will never again do anything like this again. it does seem amazing that even with all the education and information our youngsters still do such stupid things. Agree with advising dd & friend about calling parents/999/neighbour if anything serious rather than relying on Facebook.

Sorry to hear about this. It's a hard lesson for you, your DD, her friends and the other parents.
I suspect many of us with younger teens will learn something from reading this as well.
I think there is something in this book about making it clear that when they are in trouble they must know that they can call you for help however bad it is.
Worth reinforcing I think.

This is exactly my problem with my teenagers.

I trust my younger two. I like and trust most of their friends.

I don't trust any other parents. I have been landed in it by too many parents who are either, frankly, negligent, or liars, or who want so much to be friends with their teenagers that they lose all sense of responsibility.

I would be livid with parents leaving 13 year olds alone without telling you.

I wouldn't punish your dd, by the way (apart from a stern talking to).

Did the other parents not contact you to see if she is ok .

I would not expect a bunch of 13yos in a party situation to be sensible. I would expect them to get up to some grade of mischief if left alone (I would have done so at their age). Hunting for porn or sampling alcohol, sexual activity or unpleasant dares, all sorts. So yes I would be peeved with the naivety of the hosting parents. Chalk it up to experience.

Weirdly enough I was more sensible at 15 than 13.

oops, I only just spotted the "only 2 of them".
okay, that changes things, 2 should be sensible left alone. I'd still be upset with her mate, though, for encouraging the situation on, presuming the mate does not have similar issues. Nothing to be done, just a note to self that she's not as reliable a friend as I would have hoped for.

All good advise so many thanks. Good news dd now feeling much better had a bit of a panic last night and this morning as she was having really bad stabbing lower stomach pains after being ok the rest of the day. Took her to doctor who thinks it is nothing to worry about and will pass so she had day off school but should b ok tomorrow. She says she will not touch alcohol again so fingers crossed. Also have discussed better to contact parents when there are problems rather than Facebook and will get her to learn a out recovery position. she has now basically moved on and acts as though it happened yeR ago which is her way of dealing with things... Just hope she remembers this lesson though and she is very clear not to glorify the episode to her friends at school!