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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

wits end

4 replies

iwanttoleavehome · 02/12/2011 10:59

My just turned 16yr old son is giving me much cause for concern, he is half way through his exams, he has been released from 2 already due to lack of interest and non attendence to them and yet he continues to stuggle getting to school for the 3 1/2 days he still has to attend.

We have spoken about his future on many occassions and he assures me he wants to achieve something from his GCSE's rather than nothing, but his actions speak louder than his words when week after week he just about manages 2 days attendence.

my son wants for nothing,( basic needs not comercial gimmicks) I provide a comfortable clean home that he spends more time in than me as I work full time + extra just to survive this economy and mortgage rates.

I'm advised not continue to nag and rant at him about his selfish lazy ways and what his future will hold other wise but it just falls on deaf ears ans its just causing me heartache and turmoil and not doing any better for him.

I have removed his computer, stopped buying treats to eats, Have given him independant chores like own ironing and bedding changing not drastic I know but a push in the right direction i feel. He does not drink, smoke or do drugs in fact leaving the house is a rareaty.

I do feel I dislike him very much and cant tollerate any more of his selfishness and if he told me he was leaving home tomorrow I would shead a tear but want to throw a party.!!

OP posts:
GypsyMoth · 02/12/2011 11:06

How come he has a reduced timetable? ( wondering if this might be the way to go for dd, not judging you!)

Does he have plans for college next year? Apprentice?

It's bloody hard, I sympathise. Dd found army cadets, she loves this and has given her a real boost and reason to carry on working, but she seems to be getting lazier.

kreechergotstuckupthechimney · 02/12/2011 12:53

Do you think he may be depressed? lack of motivation and staying at home are pretty good pointers IMO.

Jaynie1 · 13/12/2011 12:51

Poor you. I agree with Kreecher..... - he may be depressed so taking him along to the doctor might be worth doing. Also you could talk to the school - it is sometimes possible for the school to help with part time work placements to run alongside classes - so he gets a taste of work. This may help if he lacks interest in school currently.
When all else fails, he can retake the year if necessary - so all is not lost if he messes up the exams

WelshCerys · 14/12/2011 19:12

I've just said this on another thread .... my DS missed a lot of school for various reasons - we were so, so worried. Eventually - much turmoil later - caught up (well a year later than his peer group but what's a year) and is now happy at Uni. Don't despair. Your firm line is a sign of your love for him - I bet deep down he knows that.

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