Should I allow my 15 son to have mobile on at night

[milo46]

I am having various confrontations with my son about his mobile being on late into the night. He used to go to bed around 10ish to read now all he seems to be doing is messing around on his blackberry! It's driving me insane - do you think I am right in taking the phone away and turning off at an appropriate time - he thinks I'm weird because I want his phone all the time - he seems to have definitely changed into a grump teenager. He doesn't come out of his room much and socialise with us and is very secretive about a lot of things when I ask him about facebook/mobile etc. How do I handle this - any comments please?

DS used to have his phone on all night. Till we changed to itemised billing when we couldn't work out how he was on it so much, and we realised how little sleep he must be getting!

Assuming you're paying the phone bill, I don't see any reason not to have a curfew for it - while he's meant to be asleep, it should be switched off. He doesn't need it on to be contectde in an emergency, I'm sure!

I regret not having made it a rule that phones stay out of the bedroom after bedtime - before the dreaded Blackberry it wasn't a problem as she never had any credit, but now the blasted BBM is in existence, I know she is messing around on it half the night, although I can't prove that as she's on PAYG so no itemised billing. Wish I had made the rule long ago, as it's very hard to get them to agree and not rebel when you try to create a new rule when they are this age, or at least is certainly is with DD2.

if you're paying for it (and presumably as he's 15 it's in your name) then you're perfectly within your rights to insist that it's turned off and left downstairs at a reasonable time

on school nights, ds leaves his phone downstairs when he goes to bed - he knows that if he doesn't keep to his side of the bargain, I won't keep to mine - i.e. I'll cancel the contract and then he'll be stuck!!

Have the same issue with my DS, also 15. He uses the messeges in his iPod. I don't want to take his iPod, so, as it works through the broadband, I have taken to switching the hub off at bedtime, is a pain for me as limits my Internet use after 10pm, as a student it can be seriously limiting, but unfortunately he has proved repeatedly that he is not willing to just go to bed, and the grumpy boy next morning is unfair on everyone else who lives in the house!
He broke his phone, and I can't afford to replace it, so for now at least, that isn't an issue. I do think that at 15 they should be allowed privacy, and to have their stuff in their room, but at the same time, they are not adults yet and boundaries still need to be set and maintained.
Good luck!

I agree with the others.

My DD aged 14, has to hand over her Blackberry at 10pm on schoolnights. The internet goes off at around the same time. DD often complains about it, because she would like to be "texting and BBMing all night, like her friends". I have told her that's exactly why I don't want you to have it!

At weekends and during school holidays, I'm a lot more relaxed about it.

I get my dd to charge her phone overnight in my room, otherwise she would be on it late into the night. It is a good rule I think.

My daughter was texting half the night - impossible to do homework effectively if waiting for texts/texting - not to mention sleep. Now phone downstairs on hall table at 8.30. Which reminds me it's not there - I'm going to fetch it right now! - (stomps off upstairs)

No phone off at night definitely, and please, turn your wireless router off too so he has no internet access.

Thank you for the messages - have started to tell him BB comes out of his room at 10 and internet goes off - is working so far :-)