Read an earlier thread about a DS, 14, who is (maybe by now, was?!) rude, disobedient, generally very, very difficult. The OP was assured that this was normal behaviour. I have a similar problem right now - and as I write this, honestly, I'm crying and feeling desperately unhappy.
My DS, 15, was lively, chatty, and sociable. Until a year or so ago. Big brother problems haven't helped - but that said, we give him as happy and fulfilled life as we possibly can. However, DS rarely goes out, apart from to school. Glued to the x-box/computer/i-pod. This evening, an outburst from hell. I gently asked him why he'd spend the day indoors (again) and he told me that it was always my fault.
That when he comes home from school, for example, I tell him off about not joining clubs, not going outside and so ... he doesn't. When I remonstrated, saying this was so wrong, he became very angry and said "Shut the f... up".
An impasse. DH barely intervened - a wonderful DH in many respects but rarely backs me when DS is being particularly unpleasant and it's always me that's the target of his anger/frustration etc (it's usually mums, isn't it?)
I gently encourage DS to get out, to think about joining the odd thing, to do stuff after school. Also to study (year 11) and get a balance. And to get the whole x-box thing in perspective. I know I should apply stricter sanctions - control it more. Believe me, after tonight, I am going to. It's clear now to me that he has decided that I can be blamed for his present lifestyle. He must know it's not good for him - he gets stomach cramps, is very pale, spotty and behind with school work.
I feel right now that I can't do a thing right. Feel wretched - his words and outbursts have had that effect. Middle DS is off to Uni for the first time next weekend and we'll all miss him - DS, 15, will and this have something to do with his moods. But it can't be right that he's left me feeling very, very dejected. Oldest DS still a problem, not living here at present, but has caused havoc. Kind words and support for me on that score on another thread.
Oh for a happy, normal family! Any words of support or advice welcome.