Hi virgin
I have not got any experience of this but am sorry that your post has, so far, gone unanswered so I thought I'd leave you a message - for a bit of support for you as much as anything else. This can only be incredibly hard for you, as well as your DD.
Is she lop-sided, as it were, or just over-sized? Is it just the appearance of this area that worries her or is there discomfort or a functional problem that is causing her distress? I don't understand why wearing a bikini would post a problem - surely everything is contained in her briefs? Or is it just that the whole business has left her underconfident and shy of swimwear in general?
OK... So the GP says that the NHS will offer a procedure and you have seen a consultant. She's nearly 17.
I think that if I were in your position I would be trawling the internet for information but presumably you're already doing this.
If she's going to have it done, clearly it is vitally important that it is performed by the very top person in this field, to minimise the small risk of resultant loss of sensitivity to as teeny and negligible a risk as possible. So, how did you feel about the Consultant that you saw? Have you got any medical friends who you could speak to in confidence as to who is the best gynaecologist (or is it a plastic surgeon?) for this type of procedure. It may be that the first Consultant that you saw is The One - perhaps the GP has referred you to him/ her for a reason? I'd be apt to try to ascertain, though, that labiaplasty is his/ her specialist area and that he/ she is not just a jobbing OB/GYN who rarely performs this operation.
If you think this person is The One and you have more questions and need more time before committing to the procedure, would you consider calling his private secretary and paying for a one-off private consultation with him (I'm guessing £100 max?). In the scheme of things, it's not a lot to pay if the operation is being done on the NHS and you want to feel very confident before she is admitted.
If you don't have a good strong "yes" feeling about this first person, I would hold off and do more research. Perhaps you could make another appointment with your GP if he/ she is lovely and ask about any other surgeons who else could be a possibility.
One thing to say though - whilst a kind and reassuring "bed-side" manner can be very seductive, I would concentrate primarily on the surgical skills and experience of the Consultant. It's his technical expertise in the theatre that is the most important issue here, not how holdy-handy he is.
My heart goes out to your DD, bless her, and to you to. No-one wishes for this but if it's such an issue for her and she wants to do something about it, I guess you have to dig deep as a Mum and support her.
I'd be interested to know how things pan out, virgin, would you update this thread and let me know how things develop?
Poor little thing. I send you both every good wish and hope that everything goes swimmingly and turns out very, very well. Very best wishes to you both.