17 year old dd smoking ¬¬

[DarlaDoll]

my daughter is rubbish when it comes to hiding and lying about things. i was hanging up a coat she left on the sofa and a half-used packet of menthol cigarettes fell out the pockets.

i've devastated that she's started, especially when she would comment on how vile/dangerous smoking was and now it seems she's a complete hypocrite. only one person in our family smokes and he has lung cancer- and only about 2 people in her friendship group does it so i don't think it's peer pressure.

we've had a talk about it which didn't involve shouting for once and she confided in me that since she's stopped drinking and eating junk food due to starting slimming world- she gets her kicks out of smoking a cigarette a day. she said it destresses her and she's not addicted because she has 1-2 a day. i believe her on this because i didn't think she was for real at first but she showed me the receipt from her purse and she's made a packed of 20 last two weeks.

she has a town ID from an older cousin which is what she said she used to buy them, but it's pointless taking it a way as she's 18 in a matter of days. she is going to be an adult soon so i can't make her stop like she would if she was a 14 year old- but i just really really don't want her doing it.

i phoned my mum and she said that her having one cheeky cigarette in the garden was the lesser of two evils in comparison to chain smoking and being late to lessons but i honestly don't like it.

any advice?

I have just discovered DD is smoking at 14 and I hate it. I have tried reasoning, shouting, banning her from doing it but nothing stops her.
The GP said it was her choice but he did tell her about the risks to her health. She is not allowed to smoke in the house and if I find any smoking gear I through it in the bin.
I have just told her that she will die younger than she would if she didn't smoke. She will have less money and she will have wrinkles and smell.
Hasn't worked though. Doesn't help that her boyfriend's mum lets him smoke in the house at 16.

Where does she get the money to buy cigarettes?

she buys them out of her own wages....she has a job- she's nearly 18 and going to uni in september. haven't given her pocket money since she got her first job at 13.

My son is a smoker too.. has been since he was 15 (just turned 18) We tried talking to him, grounding him, bla bla... and he took absolutely no notice despite promising us he would. He also earns his own money.

In the end we have had to back off . He isn't allowed to smoke at home and we are rather pointed about how disgusting we think it smells.. but we can't stop him. I think he will quit in his own time or when he meets a girl who tells him to stop! Or at least I hope so...:/

I started smoking when I was 16. My mum found out about it when I was 18 or so, and tried everything possible to get me to quit. But the old saying is true, people won't quit for anyone apart from themselves. I didn't want to quit, so I didn't. A number of times I lied to her and told her I'd quit.

The only thing she could do was ban me from smoking in front of her or in our house or garden but I'd be lying if I said it encouraged me to quit. I didn't end up quitting until I was pregnant.

I don't even have any comforting words. I started when I was 12, my mum found out when I was 14 and stopped smoking herself to encourage me.
I am 47 in a few days time and still on the fags.

Smoking is a tool she is using in her campaign to lose weight. Cigarettes are a well known appetite suppressant. Menthol cigarettes are stronger and contain more tar. She has chosen cigarettes that have a taste as she is dieting. They also give you a bigger hit when you inhale. She is probably having them when she is most hungry and needing something to stop her from eating. You can only hope that when she reaches her ideal weight she will stop smoking. At the very least you should point out that she is only using this as a tool and that you understand this but that she should think about this with a view to stopping when she has reached her goal.

You can express your disapproval and insist on no smoking in the house but ultimately, it's up to her. It's her body and her health.

OP, you can tell your DD that smoking is not an appetite supressant. I am probably around 14 stones in weight. We don't have any scales so I can't be sure.