15 yr old dd thinks I am evil.

[caercialost]

Now I know in the grand scheme of things this is NOT a big thing. All my dd have jobs and the 15 yr old does the pots. She washes, dries and puts away. I have told her that this has to be done by 8pm AND she understands the sliding scale of laptop confiscation for not doing this. Last night after a week of losing her laptop for longer and longer and doing the dishes as late as she can, she started to load the dishwasher and wash the remaining pots at 7.30 and so finished at about 8.01. She says I am not being fair in sticking to my punishment as she only missed the deadline by a few seconds.
Now Although I agree with this, she will not be allowed to use that excuse in the real world. Exams dont allow you to go over by any length of time, if your late for work you are late! and the fact is that she CHOSE to leave starting the job until the last minute, so I am hoping this will teach her about getting jobs done at the right time NOT the last minute.

What do you guys think?

From an entirely different perspective, this was my dad 15 years ago. he grounded me for being 1 minute late home. What i tried to tell him, that he wouldn't listen to, is that the back gate had become jammed against the wall and I'd had to lift it heavily to move it, and it took me a minute to do so.

I have NEVER forgotten his petty mindedness. I have never forgotten that he treated me in a way he wouldn't have DREAMED of treating his juniors at work (and he was a police sergeant, not a namby pamby office worker!)

It was just twatty. I thought so then, and now, with 15 years and two children giving me a new perspective, I still think it was twatty.

i agree with colditz - i can see how this can be helping your relationship AT ALL.

at work - a real place of work - usually they are interested in results - and unless she is a championship athlete or newspaper editor - usually the seconds and minutes don't actually matter - as long as the work is done to a deadline of a day.

it really is petty - and im not sure why there is a timescale on it at all.

so she does her job and gets rewarded in what way?

becuase if she doesn't do it - she gets punished - so what is her incentive?

if the incentive to get it done is the punishment - thats a really crappy way of going about it - i mean in the world of work how would that fly

"i want you to do me a report by 10am and not and not a second later"

umm well i know i work here - but i'm not actually getting paid

"yes well, if you DONT do it - you are fired"