Home alone

[happygolucky0]

Hello

I was wondering if you could give me some ideas when what you think of ........ leaving a 13 and half year old over night at home two or three times a week. I work nights and would leave at 9pm and be home at 8am.

He is quite intellgent and has been at home on his own during the day for short periods for over a year and things hasve gone well. He sticks to the rules that are set as best as possible.
I am a single parent and he has been with at a childminders overnight for the past four years. It just seems that he is getting abit old to still be staying over a childminders now.
What your views ladies and gents? What age did you leave your kids and go out until late.?
Thanks

I've just spoken to my DS and asked him if he'd mind me leaving him X nights per week as per your OP.

He said "I wouldn't be scared () but I definitely wouldn't like it at all, what if I fell over when making a cup of tea and spilt boiling water on me? (er...ok DS) basically, I wouldn't want to be on my own that much"

Aw, I love DS. He is so fab.

My DS (13) would agree with yours' Shirley, and so would i - there's no way i'd leave my DS home alone overnight at his age.

Shirley........ ofcourse I wouldn't leave him if he was in the least bit scared.

Vicar........... Yes you are right and do agree with you.

Usual ...... No family isn't really an option.

takingchances ..........sorry to hear that thanks for sharing ...

Sharbie..... ok no worries thanks for your concern for my lad.

ok .....it is my Mum and Dad who are saying to me that I was treating like a baby by him still sleeping at a childminders house. So wanted to know what everyone else thought. And now I know so thank you.

Ok, cool. Please talk to your son. Maybe in the context of something you read on MN? Like I did and you might get an idea of how your son feels.

No never

Take no notice of what your parents are saying OP, you're being sensible if he stays with someone.

Not at 13, no. I would, however, leave my eldest ds who is 15 almost 16 on an odd occassion if the need arose. Even then I would be worried even though he is less likely than me to burn the house down, lock himself out, fall down the stairs etc etc

I have daughter who is 13 and know she would be scared to be left alone despite the fact that she is very capable, can cook simple meals, do the shopping etc

I am happy to leave my 10yo alone in the day, but would not leave a 13yo overnight, certainly not on a regular basis. It's not to do with risks, just that I think they need the security of an adult around at a time when they need to relax and let go. So more about feelings than actual risks, perhaps, but would still weigh with me.

I'm with cat. I'd do the same for a friend of mine who had no-one else, if it were only specific nights per week. Would make sure DC knew it was staying the night, not a sleepover.

I just asked DD14 how she would feel and she would feel fine, she said. That may be because DS16 has already stayed on his own overnight, but I was in contact with him quite a lot. It was DS's choice. He is a football ref, we were going on a camp with a few other families and he wanted to ref a tournament and not come with us.

It's difficult, isn't it. I see what is meant about a childminder and DS, but don't call it a childminder, call it something else. Just say that he stays somewhere else overnight. If he and you don't want him to be on his own, then do what you want. I also think that 13 is quite young and wouldn't leave any of mine overnight at that age.

I leave my nearly 16 year old looking after my 12 year old on occasional evenings but always make sure I'm home before he goes to bed. Can't imagine leaving them overnight though!