Do CAHMS ever tell parents anything if child over 16?

[sarva]

Hi there,
DD had first meeting with CAHMS yesterday, but I wasn't allowed to sit in as she is 16 years and 3 mths and she said she would prefer to talk to them on her own. DD is quite secretive anyway, so couldn't get mauch out of her about how it went, but told me they couldn't give her a diagnosis as they didn't want to "label her". She said they were weird and it was all pointless. She thinks she may get counselling, but sees this as a waste of time as she wouldn't tell them anythng. They are going to send her GP a letter, but I won't see this as she is over 16, so still feel completely in the dark. Anyone had this kind of experience with CAHMS? I feel so disappointed, as though this would really help. She seems lower in mood than ever following the meeting - I thnk she was hoping for anti-depressants/sleeping pills.

Oh, yes.
They won't tell you anything, patient confidentiality.
Actually, think that may be the case even when they're under 16, not very sure.
They'll send a copy of the GP letter to her, so if she's not opposed to you seeing her post, then you could also read this.
It might take a while to help, is she in a lower mood because she's having to think about things that are troubling her?
Give it time, after about 3 sessions DD came out of them smiling and 'feeling lighter', but still secretive.

FWIW, any diagnosis they give in the first few sessions can be changed quickly, if your DD is secretive then she could well be hiding the things that matter to a different diagnosis, iykwim.

Tbh they don't tell you a lot when they are under 16 either. Dd is 14, I sat in on the first session, but after that it's all between her and the counsellor. Part of the treatment as far as I can see is to get dd to take charge of her situation, and that won't necessarily be helped by having mum there at her side. It's very frustrating though, when you know they are just not telling the truth. But I suppose the real horrible truth is that dd cannot be helped unless she takes responsibility: this is one battle I cannot fight for her.

I have just had one session with them but my DD is 14. However, I know how frustrating its when you don't know what is going on as DD had counselling at school and I did not have a clue what was happening in there. When I went to first session at camhs they told me I would get help to give me strategies to cope at home - at next session I am going to get them to clarify that for me and push to get help aswell as DD. The only other thing I can suggest is that - when things got bad I started keeping a diary of what happened and even wrote down word for word some of the text messages DD had sent me and things she had said. Camhs told me these would be very helpful - so why not try that! At least you will be having a voice and an input.

Thanks so much for helpful ideas - all make sense. I think first seesion stirred up lots of uncomfortable thoughts and feelings, so that's probably why she has gone downhill again. Yes, it is early days and only she can get herself out of this. Will keep a diary of things and wait to see what they come back with. She said she asked them to email her the letter, so I won't see it. She may tell me though.. thanks for all your replies.