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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

I feel like i've 'lost' my daughter since she started secondary school..........

3 replies

MrsDucklips · 23/03/2011 13:21

This is my first Mumsnet post so forgive me if it rambles! My eldest daughter (12) has always been a dream child - out of my 2 daughters she's always been the good one. She started secondary school in September and literally within 4 weeks she's changed completely. She gone from telling me everything to grunting at me (if I'm lucky). She spends far too long on facebook in my opinion (so we've restricted it to 1 hour only on a week night) and texts constantly. She isn't a 'bad' kid just not the one I've had for the past 12 years. Tbh it isn't her that's the problem cos I think how she's behaving and acting is probably completely normal for her age, it's more the way I feel about it that's the issue. I literally feel like I've lost someone and am grieving. I feel tearful and am sleeping fitfully - I do realise how pathetic this all sounds (especially having read what some other parents are going through) but I just wanted to know if I'm the only one?

OP posts:
MADABOUTTHEBOY2000 · 23/03/2011 13:42

hi no your not alone , is she getting on ok at the school?, all teens go through this and they do e, sheventually come out the other sode they disapear into their room for hours o fb and msn and spend rest of time texting , seems they would rather talk to their peers than you and it is all of a sudden , quite normal yet annoying , youve done nothing wrong but she obviously needs her space, why dont you offer her to go into town for lunch and buy somethig to wear(let her choose) a girls day out might make you both bond a bit again and in a jolly mood actually talk thats what i do now and again with my DD 13.9 yo

MrsDucklips · 23/03/2011 14:07

Hi Madabouttheboy2000, thanks for that.

I'm pleased to say that she's doing really well at school and has friends etc. She does talk to me when she wants to and I just try to make sure I'm available to listen. We do have the odd girlie day out shopping which always puts her in a good mood (as long as we're buying stuff for her ha ha). I just need to accept that her friends opinions are now far more important to her than mine and that they will be her first port of call. I know it's my issues regarding loss of control but I just need to learn to deal with it!

OP posts:
MADABOUTTHEBOY2000 · 23/03/2011 14:51

i think its to do with this queen bee thing about pre teens and teens in news today theres a book might help search.barnesandnoble.com/Queen-Bees-Wannabes/Rosalind-Wiseman/e/9781400047925

i might even buy it myself looks interesting , i know how you feel anyway , have a glass tonight n relaxWine at least it will pass in a blur lol

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