13-yr-old being bullied

[BerwickBarbara]

Hi, my 13-year-old boy used to have a solid set of friends but they've suddenly turned against him and have started sending very nasty messages on Facebook (he let us check and he has not prompted any of these or responded). Today we persuaded him to block them but he's also worried they will start to be even worse to him at school (they've started shunning him). The Facebook messages confirm it's all over a very trivial matter - they accuse him of copying them by getting the same games etc (but they all do it!).
He's very down and lonely and now also worried that things will get worse at school because they can't get at him via Facebook. I don't want to make things worse but I don't want to do nothing. Any advice anyone??

no advice here but sorry to hear. it can be very sad hopefully someone on here can offer thier support or experience. i have never used facebook it opens you up to all kinds of scrutiny and kids can be so petty

That seems a really trivial reason for them all turning against him en mass. Has something else happened to prompt this?
I only have a 9.10 DD, so have no idea of the workings of a male mind.

Thanks - we thought it had blown over but it seemed to annoy them that he was "not bothered any more" so they've started sending these messages again.

They also call him spoiled - I know what you are all thinking now, but he honestly is a nice kid who is kind to others and I genuinely can't imagine him bragging about anything! I think maybe they resent some of the things he has and the main instigator is a kid who always wants to be top dog. But up until recently they seemed to spend every waking moment at our house - during the school holidays we even feed them all day - but suddenly they are saying they've never liked him since first school. We're all baffled.

this has happened to my DCs ive two DS and a DD the girls are bitchy and harbour grudges longer the Boys its usually blows over quickly, but to be sure id ask to speak to the schools behaviour team and have it out with them your ds will say no dont as he will be worried they will bring them all in to chat, but this may be best idea as maybe then you can also go in and see them taking a snapshot of the convos where they have been so very nasty to him with you, hardly lie then can they with proof and if cant do that say you yourself saw the remarks ect give your ds a treat and talk a lot if you cant talk to him get another friend of family or relative who can, something ELSE has happened probably jealousy on this boy part who wants to be top dog it sounds kind of gang like one bully egging the others on maybe there all scared of this horrible boy and thats why they are coppying his behaviour, does the school have some sort of buddy system in place and ask to see their bullying policy should be readilly available good luck (hugs)

Thanks you so much - I think you have got it spot on - I am talking to the school and we have printed out the Facebook stuff.
The "top dog" lad is actually very clever rather than physically strong but he certainly seems to have the others in thrall and he is definitely doing the egging on. My DS is also quite bright so maybe that is why he sees him as a threat.
Thank you for the supportive message - at the moment I just feel sick every time I think about it and so does DS, but I know this will pass. It's harder to explain this to a 13-yr-old!