black ops?

[controlfreakery]

my 13(and a half) year old son only wants one thing for xmas... cod black ops (18 cert). I am 99% sure that I don't want to buy him this. he thinks i am mrs meany mcmean from meantown. is he right??please let me have your views...

God that sounds dreadful. I don't have teenagers myself but my instinct would be to say no, no and no again and speak to other parents to see if they are aware of the content.

Tbh having read the post detailing this game I wouldn't buy if for an adult that wanted it, let alone a child.

Thankfullt am not likely to have to make that choice as just have the one DD who is 6.

"...but all my friends have a DS..." is our current argument du jour - so I do feel your pain OP!

Not all modern video games are violent - most DS and Wii ones are fine. Even the PS3; - it's lovely!

Another vote against this particular game for a 13 year old boy and another vote for getting the Kinect instead.

LittleWhiteSnowWolf - Fallout New Vegas is awesome but a major time suck and definitely not one for the non adults.

DS has asked for "Need for Speed Hot Pursuit" for the xbox for his 14th birthday on monday - obviously there is something wrong with him as this game is only a 12 rating. The last time I looked he was happy and popular without the need to play 18 rated games but then again most of his friends don't play them either because their parents actually said no to them as well.

Just musing to myself: it was interesting how many boys were 'off sick' from the secondary school where I work on the day Black Ops came out. Also interesting how most of these were from lower ability sets. Fascinating how many of their 'mates' were willing to dob them in with 'His mum's taken him to pick up Black OPs - what a $%£^!'
Moral highground appeared to be with those who didn't need to rush off and get it.
My 12 year-old only has a ds, and he doesn't like shoot-em-up games; so perhaps I am the lucky one!

It's not how it affects him now though. It's later on. I have seen it first hand in my brother (now 18 but played these games since he was about 12/13), and it's just an underlying lack of...well, horror at violence. He's still a gentle person in the sense that he would not copy the violence, but the years of playing these games means he is no longer shocked by anything. He watches violent programmes on the television and laughs, because he thinks that is the appropriate response. His understanding of good and bad is also skewed. He can rattle off the names of WW1&2 weapons without thought, but can't explain why the battles were fought, or why we consider the Nazis to be evil, beyond the most simplistic reasons. getting him to understand the difference between hapless footsoldiers and truly evil military types is hard. To him they are all just enemies on a screen.

My DS is a long way from this, but I will certainly not be backing down, and if I suspect that he is simply playing these games at friends houses I will seriously consider a ban on visiting them (though they will be welcome to visit us). As I said, it is not the short term I am worried about - of course they don't copy the violence! But in the long term these children grow up without appropriate responses to violence, and that is not a good thing at all.

And that's quite apart from the addiction factor, which is just as bad. My brother used to get up at 5am sometimes to play these games, or would still be playing well after midnight (obviously not the same day). He lost all interest in other activities, and when we visited my dad would jst sit in his room on his XBox and only leave it for meals and bathroom breaks. It's just not healthy, and now that he's finally developing other interests again, he's got to overcome a weight problem and fitness issues.

Some of the comments on this thread are becoming very moralistic and judgemental.
A friend of mine has two boys who are not allowed to have this game in their house for all the reasons stated above. A highly hypocritical and sanctimonious position if you ask me since they are happy for their sons to play it in both my house and other people's houses but they still hold the 'moral' high ground of 'not in their house'.
My son is perfectly aware that it is fantasy - in fact, it is a tool for him to liaise with his school friends who live way too far for him to see at weekends/hols. He still watches Disney channel and plays 12+ games - he is not a raving psychopath who talks about torturing people or slashing their throats.
This subject is highly emotive but I say you need to look at your own circumstances, your child, and take off the judgy knickers - they tend to be too tight.

Anyone here aware that COD was made for the military to desencitise soldiers after battle, and as a way of dealing with PTSD? As the wife of a soldier who has seen active service and actually been in these situations for real, I don't see these games as entertainment. A friends son couldn't believe that there was such a thing as an 'Actual' Claymore mine, and it could do so much damage to a person. Get real!
This gives a totaly unrealistic vision of what this is really like, we've even been told by someone that he 'knew what it must have been like out there as he'd played this game' - bloody insult!

^^ I think that that is a bloody insult also. I am continually telling my son that CoD is nothing like 'real' war - he can't respawn ffs. My son is in agreement that he understands it is not real and also knows that playing from the comfort of his armchair is not like living in a war zone remotely.
I don't disagree with any of your comments. I do disagree with some posters who won't allow this game in their home but are complicit in their children playing it outside the home.
Whilst my son does play it at home, if I told him not to do so in another person's house - he wouldn't.

I think our dc with a great grandad who served in Burma and Grandad who's ex SAS and Dad who is an ex para they understand these are just games and nothing like real life,I know Dh has said to the eldest 2 that many times in Northern Ireland it would have been easier if it was like COD.

Tott your post was very thought provoking but I think its just common for children these days to have less of a shock factor,its the way it goes with access to technology things are not as taboo as they were.....dh was horrified at the dettol advert where it showed germs and things growing out of the bin as a child that would scare him,also daleks kids hid behind the settee when they were on tv in the late 60s....its not good but its the world we live in.

I remember a friend of mine not allowing her dd to wear a toe ring as she wished to keep her a child yet this child was fascinated with Harold Shipman and knew everything about him .....is that childhood?

I know a 6 year old who plays this with his dad, what are peoples thoughts on this?

Tott, you have put into words the general feeling I have about the yobs of today,about their lack of empathy and inappropriate responses to violence and suffering. Its like their responses and feelings are 'watered down' to the point that something that would provoke horror and empathy in normal people, just washes over them.

And the possible reason for this, is violence in games and films, like Saw etc.

Anyone here aware that COD was made for the military to desencitise soldiers after battle, and as a way of dealing with PTSD?

I hadn't heard this? THere's nothing on wikipedia about it...
I knew that "America's Army" is a propaganda game for the US military (free on PC), but I would've thought CoD was just a copy of the earlier videogame Medal of Honor(very similar?

maryz I am doing exactly the same as you- said so upthread

let's hope our ds's little faces light up on Christmas morning- rather than facing a day long sulk

...plus is it really shallow to say I really like the look of AC? I watched the trailer with my mouth open. FABulous...

It's 18 rated for a reason. Why would you want a 13/14/15 to have it?

I don't let my 13 year old DD watch 18 films - not because I think she's going to start using bad language/turn into a psycho killer/have rampant sex but because she's still a child and I don't think that the content of 18 rates films or games are suitable for children and at 13/14/15 - whatever they think themselves - they are children.

I also monitor what she reads as - for example - I don't want her reading books that normalise casual sex (for example) or at least not until her own moral compass is firmly set.

Tott makes a good point, being regularly exposed to violent content on TV or via games desensitises kids.

The "COD was made by the military to desensitise soliders" thing is an urban myth.

Call Of Duty started out as a WWII themed FPS (First Person Shooter) in 2003, and very good it was!. And over ten games have carried the name, only 2 in modern times (Black Ops not being one, being set to a cold war 1960's background). The franchise has been developed by numerous companies, all of which are private firms. If its been used to help in rehabilitation on soldiers suffering from PTSD it coincidental, and "desensitising soldiers", i can think of several more violent games and countless movies that would desensitise me more.

Americas Army is a free FPS (with much more tactical game play) developed and released by the US Army specifically as recruitment tool. It has a very large following and is open about its military roots.

It totally depends on your childs mentality and your ability to understand where they are. My U13 are really keen to get it but i may hold off for a year although he will think I am the most oppresive parent in the world and he may play it at others houses...But, my job is to parent and not be his friend,

Some people seem to think all games are bad, that's not true.
In the case of something like the Nintendo Wii and DS most of their games are more family based and child friendly. DS is probably a good "starter" really, though downside being it's a handheld and can be played anywhere (a console has to be played in 1 place in the house).
Also many parents seem to ignore the Parental Controls in all consoles. All of them now have settings for parents to use. Infact some computer games (example: World of Warcraft) have parental settings where you can stop them accessing certain stuff and only be able to play certain things at certain times of the day and how long for.

Petit - I completely agree with you. There's nothing inherantly wrong with video games, (I play quite a few myself , and people do often overreact because of one or two horror stories and have a blanket disapproval.

The problem here is not so much games in general, but the idea of 13 year olds playing violent games marketed at adults. My brother has XBox live and often remarks now about 13 year old children playing the same games as him in multiplayer, and teabagging corpses and effing and blinding all over the place. They tend (and obviously the law of aaverages dictates that there will be exceptions) to get very irate quickly, and scream and shout at other players when they are "killed".

Slighltly distasteful definition of teabagging here, definition 7 is the one referring to the game context. Probably NSFW.

I have a friend who lets her 11 yr old ds play this whilst her 5 yr old looks on. She also lets him watch really violent horror films without compunction.

It may be a coincidence, but he's a cheeky, arrogant little foul mouth!

I watched some of Black Ops in my 19 yr old nephew's room and was shocked at the violence & brutality.

My 12 yr old ds has shown no interest in this game but even if he did, there is no way we'd let him play it.

I don't get that 'yeah, but all their friends play it' school of parenting. So what?

It's a thoroughly unpleasant game imo, and wholly unsuitable for what are still young children.

I don't think anyone is assuming these kids will turn into psychopaths, but do any of us know the damage being caused to still developing brains/personalities?

Another weekend on Black Ops, another weekend of eye gouging and stabbing .... I'm not sure it's suitable for this 30-something let alone a 13 year old, it's a bit grim.

Any tips from other gamers on this thread for less violent alternatives? More like the Halo level of violence - bashing/shooting cartoon aliens etc? I've played all the Halos already.