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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Have I done the right thing? Drugs

5 replies

venusinflares · 22/10/2010 10:31

Hello,

Over the last few months it has become apparent that the 16 year old lad next door and his friends have got themselves into drugs. The first time I overheard them talking, I was shocked to say the least. They know all the terminology and whenever his parents are out they all congregate there and smoke cannabis. I have also overheard them talking about taking pills which I assume must be ecstasy. These lads have only just done their GCSE's this year - they are not even old enough to drink or smoke cigarettes but they seem to know an awful lot about illegal substances. I'm not a fuddy duddy - I know teenagers experiment and try things (I did!) but the way they talk, it sounds like it's gone beyond a bit of a dabble, they even refer to their 'dealer'.

There was one night last month when the parents were away and this group of lads were sat in the garden all night talking the only kind of rubbish that comes from drug taking. The next morning our garden was littered with spliff ends that had been thrown over the hedge so my husband got the biggest, fattest one and took it back, had a word about the noise and handed him the spliff back, asking if he would stop throwing drugs paraphenalia into our garden. The lad was absolutely mortified because obviously, he knows that we know what is going on.

I've been wrestling with my conscience, I really felt his parents ought to know, if it was me, I would want to know. We saw his dad in the pub the other day and he was talking about what a good, sensible lad he was and I just blurted it out - I told him he needed to keep an eye on him as we had become aware that he has been doing cannabis and ecstasy with his mates. He was extremely shocked (as you would be) and my husband went absolutely mental with me for telling him, he said they will never speak to us again and that I should have kept my mouth shut.

Now I am experiencing all sorts of emotions, should I have been honest or should I have kept it shut. I really don't know.

Did I do the right thing? What would you have done, would you want to know?

OP posts:
winnybella · 22/10/2010 10:35

Hmm. I see your DH's point of view, but if I were the parent, I would want to know.

Byblyofyle · 22/10/2010 12:00

You did the right thing! (Speaking as the parent of a 16 yo and 18 yo.)

Lauriefairycake · 22/10/2010 12:04

eh? I'd have told them months ago - the second I noticed it.

Why would your daft dh want to ignore illegal activity carried out by children in the house next door? Hmm

GetOrfMoiLand · 22/10/2010 12:09

You did the right thing telling him, I would want to know.

Why is your DH so angry, I don't understand that at all.

venusinflares · 22/10/2010 12:17

Thank you for your replies - I now feel reassured that I did the right thing. At least now his parents can speak to him - hopefully the kids are all talk and are not as involved as they'd like to make out (I really do hope so).

I don't know why DH went off on one - still trying to work that one out Confused

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