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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

refusing to wear a coat

24 replies

JuicyLucy10 · 15/10/2010 09:26

it sounds silly but my duaghter is prone to getting asthma and chest bugs... she had pneumonia and was hospitalised 3 yeras ago.

Its not cool to wear a coat and she will get teased and bullied.

I am cross as I feel she must and if she does get ill I will have to take off time from work, etc.

Should I ignore this one or 'compromise'?

Is this fairly normal behaviour with your 11-12 year olds?

OP posts:
sharbie · 15/10/2010 09:28

yh normal dd feels the cold but last yr went to school all through that freezing winter with just her blazer over her school polo.

ASecretLemonadeDrinker · 15/10/2010 09:29

I'd say leave her to it - she just looks a fool shivering away but given what you have said, can you see if she will wear a coat she chooses and deems 'cool'? Maybe also she could wear a vest type thing under her uniform - something 'cool'- a strappy sports vest, or whatever kids like these days Grin

SkippyjonJones · 15/10/2010 09:38

It is very normal sadly, thermal vests on non sports days helps. Most kids will wear some form of hooded zip front top when it gets very cold instead of a coat. I would look out for a fur lined one of those.

badgerhead · 15/10/2010 10:55

I agree it is very normall, my 13r old dd feels the cold but doesn't wear coat all the time but will wear a fashionable scarf instead, which helps.

dexter73 · 15/10/2010 11:01

My dd doesn't wear a coat either. She wears a thermal long sleeved top under her school polo shirt, and then her sweatshirt, all topped off with a scarf.

dexter73 · 15/10/2010 11:06

These are the thermal tops.

Tortington · 15/10/2010 11:10

thermal top is a great idea

also layers, vest , tshirt, shirt, jumper, blazer.

my dd always wore a fashionable scarf and gloves.

buying the was kind of a winter ritual, we used to go to accessorize becuase you could get some funky ones there

inthesticks · 15/10/2010 15:31

Normal I think, along with tiny ballet slippers.
There was a great thread on here a while ago about this subject.

inthesticks · 15/10/2010 15:34

see here

Original poster
JuicyLucy10 · 15/10/2010 15:53

thanks inthesticks. a very real but humorous read!

I went and bought grown up ladies vests today in sainsburys - i expect to have to take them in but they seem nice and grown up and pretty. All the kids ones are white or pink! Blush

Umming and aaghing about a body warmer that was suggested by dd1 on the way out the door but she will have to give the thumbs up before i waste any more money!! Hmm

OP posts:
maryz · 15/10/2010 19:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mumeeee · 15/10/2010 21:48

It's fairly normal. But when ours were younger we said that if they were under 14 they had to wear a coat or hoddie , At 14 they were allowed to wear what they wanted.
It seemed to work but I expect the coat/hoodie was stufed into thier schoolbag as soon as they were out of site.
Once they get to about 18 they start wearing coats again.

LynetteScavo · 15/10/2010 21:54

Now DS has started High School he won't wear a coat as nobody else does. Confused

He sounded quite grateful when I offered to buy him some vests.

Not wearing a coat must be one of the most stupid trends ever!

barbarianoftheuniverse · 15/10/2010 22:36

Dcs here just the same. It's partly because they have nowhere to put them when they get to school: it's either carry them around or try to stuff in tiny bulging locker. It drives me mad- dd shivered at the bus stop through last winter while her coats kept nice and warm indoors. But at least thankfully this year's shoe fashion is ankle boots- last winter's ballet shoes looked like child neglect in all that snow.

mac22 · 16/10/2010 11:46

These are great peeps, many thanks for all the info. Mine is almost 13, and is trying to loose the coat thing. As its not cool!
But we will be inVESTing in somthing.....

toomanytimes · 16/10/2010 17:52

DD has not worn a coat now for 2 years. We have extra layers scarf and gloves, however this year we are wearing a fashionable sleeveless body warmer, mind you it was designer so paid a lot for it around £55, but it was worth it for a compromise. I no longer take time off work with her if she is sick as (a) it impacts on my holiday time and (b) its her own fault for not wrapping up warmly, so if you can trust her (not always in our house) I would just let her get on with it. Zara have some nice body warmers in for £40.00 cheaper in the supermarket's if you can get away with it.

I did pick you some great thermal wear in Primark a couple of weeks ago, leggings and vest top.

6pack · 16/10/2010 19:16

What ever you do, do not impose parental induced clothing embarrassment. This could equate to social death and you will NEVER be forgiven. BTW I understand chest infections are caused by bugs, not cold. Some people seem genuinely not cold despite skimpy clothing and sub zero temperatures. Especially teenage girls. I wish I knew how they did it. Chill!

majafa · 19/10/2010 14:30

Im 43 and hate coats Grin

Just a thought, Would she wear a fleece over her school uniform?

purepurple · 19/10/2010 16:55

DD is 14 and will not wear a coat except when in the house Hmm
She won't wear her £30 school shoes either. Even though she did choose them.
I just don't get it.

piscesmoon · 19/10/2010 17:06

My DS won't wear a coat even if it is raining. I think it silly- but it is up to him.

Schroeder · 27/10/2010 15:48

H&M do some nice sweatshirt type hoodies with a fleece lining for boys and girls.
These seem to pass muster with my ds.

It does seem daft to me why he won't just wear a coat.

They do seem to have some stupid rules at school about coats that make it hard for them too.
The school uniform requirements also say they must not wear anything under their shirtsShock

Ineed2 · 27/10/2010 18:36

How are they going to enforce that Schroeder?? I think they would be on dodgy ground checking to see who has a vest on!!
Dd2[15] wears a vest top [usually white] under her shirt. No coat though, although they are allowed to walk to school in their PE fleeces so long as they take them off when they get there.

Schroeder · 27/10/2010 18:44

Well god knowsHmm. I've told ds if he's cold he should wear a plain white t shirt underneath.

It's ridiculous isn't it? Why can't they have pegs for their coats? I suppose they would have to keep anything valuble in their bags or something.

I expect a teacher will be along in a minute to tell us their reasoning and why teenagers with coats are such a problem[hgrin]

Ineed2 · 27/10/2010 18:52

Dd2 has a locker so she can take a coat if she wants to, its the hassle of going to the locker with her I think.
Dd1 left her coat in the locker when she walked out of school 3 weeks before her A levels and she never went back for it, Ggrrrr.
They do go back to wearing coats eventually, Dd1 is 22 now and has just bought herself a coat with her birthday money, I had a bit of a giggle when she told me.[hgrin].

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